Note: This is merely my prediction of the convention scene based on my seven or so odd years of experience a member of the anime and sci-fi convention scene. As such, these predictions may not hold weight. Please do not hold it against me if my theories or predictions aren’t right in 2022.
Browsing through the East Coast convention group “Casual Uncensored Congoers Kindred Society”, I encountered an interesting question asked by the administrator of the group. He asked how do we see the convention scene changing within the next five years. He then followed up with if we think American voice actors will still remain as the dominate guests, if cosplay remain a money generating commodity, and if there will be new content featured at conventions based on upcoming new ideas and trends.
Replying with my thoughts, I stated that I don’t care if people make money off cosplaying/cosfame (while realizing that bubble will burst). I also predicted that the type of guests that we will see a shift from voice actors to social media personalities, cosplay guests, etc. As I typed, I started to deeply think about the future. Things will change in five years; I have no doubt about it. Personally, I believe we are starting to see this new change of the future today. With social media growing each day, it’s easier than ever before to communicate with fellow fans – as well as the ability for content creators to showcase their talents and gain attention.
Cosplaying and attending conventions are both niche hobbies. As niches, it’s natural for the two to evolve and change overtime. What changes do I personally think hold for the future of these hobbies? Well, let’s talk about it!
PART 1: The Current Scene
We cannot discuss the future without addressing the present, and how it’ll shape the upcoming years. From what I’ve noticed, the current state of the convention scene is run by four major elements: Social media (the umbrella for both cosplay and personality fame), money (such as businesses and corporations), the mainstream (such as the “nerdy is cool” trend” and the general convention public and corporate influences. As stated earlier, I could care less if people attempt to make money through social media and cosplay. You should take advantage of both cosplay and social media – as it’s a useful tool to fill your bank account (if you’re smart and work smart – not hard)
If you have to do a lewd cosplay version of Reimu from the Touhou series to get a stack, go for it. If you have to perform goofy acts as Deadpool at a convention for your social media platforms, go for it. Money and fame attract people. Attention follows the money. The Money pays attention. I’m sure you heard the story of the Japanese cosplayer who claimed that she made over $100,000 in a course of two days during the Japanese anime convention Comiket a few years back. I bet you that many are attempting to emulate her success once that report came out.
The fastest route for some (mainly female cosplayers, blessed with great generics) to make big bucks is through lewd cosplayers: a rather controversial career path within the cosplay community. If done right, a lewd cosplayer could easily make $10,000~$13,000 a month through Pateron, sales, etc. Sex sells and people are buying. There are some (mostly jealous, insecure women and beta male virgins) who believe that lewd cosplayers are ruining the community. They think that the focus should be on cosplayers who have craftsmanship skills – not tits and ass. Non-lewd cosplayers are vocal about their hatred for sexy cosplayers. It doesn’t help that most of these sexy cosplayers are involved with some form of controversy – which will slowly ruin the image of this trend if not taken care of.
Assuming if these controversial lewd cosplayers and cosfame people continue to generate controversy (and if people stay in their jealous, hating feelings), then I can see this trend’s bubble bursting. Too many people will enter this bubble in hopes to make it big. While sex sells and attention pays out, you still need a great (and marketable) personality and brand. Jessica Nigir, whom some consider to be one of the founders of the lewd cosplay trend in the West, still makes money – despite she doesn’t do lewd cosplays as often as she used to; Thanks to her brand.
With the “nerdy is cool” trend, there’s an increase of attendance from those who may not be true nerds. With nerd culture and hobbies becoming more acceptable each day, people are hopping on the bandwagon to take advantage of it. More people (may they be real nerd or not can be ignored here) means more money for conventions – especially for conventions who’re profit. Corporations are taking notice; therefore, they want in through sponsorships. This leads to conventions becoming corporate. This isn’t necessary evil, but one must understand that few may not accept the idea of larger conventions going corporate.
From my personal research and experiences, the general convention and cosplay public community is divided on the upcoming changes. There are some who view the corporate changes, the (lewd) cosplayers who cosplay for money, and conventions going corporate as great things for the scene. Opposite, the old-school nerds are fighting against these changes in hopes that it won’t ruin and “corrupt” the traditional, imitate homely feel of conventions they’re used to (and thus, will be driven out). They refuse to accept the fact that things change. Will the corporatization of conventions become a problem within the next five years? We must wait and see then.
Discussing the future is impossible without addressing the present. Lewd cosplays and social media personalities are cosplaiyng for the money. Nerd culture is slowly becoming accepted in the mainstream. Fans fear that the convention spirit will be lost overtime, while some see this as a great idea. Or there may not be any changes. Only time will tell us in the future.
Part 2: The Future of the Scene.
The trends of today will influence the trends of tomorrow.. We’re seeing the seeds of the future planted today. With the advent of easier access to information on anime series , fans can research creators and artists of their favorite series effortlessly (thanks to the Sakuga community providing comprehensive information on these creators). Because of this, I predict that these creators will become the main guests for conventions. Now note that larger conventions such as Anime Central and Anime Expo were ahead with this, but mid-size conventions will follow suite once they increase their budget to emulate this.
Social media has impacted this new era. Like it or not, social media personalities/”celebs” are becoming more known – so much that they’re too are becoming guest of honor. Digibro – the prolific (and infamous) anime vlogger was a guest at Anime Expo 2017. Veteran Dragon Ball historian YouTuber Geekdom 101 is hosting his own convention (KamehaCon). Social Media is the superior choice for content creators in this community to become known. The more you’re known (because of your content), the more likely one could become a guest at conventions.
Social media has also created the lewd and non-lewd cosplay money boom. As with any major boom, this bubble will burst Once that happens, I imagine the following scenarios:
1. The majority will be out of work and money. They’ll be too scared to make a move and give up.
The minority will take advantage of the bubble burst (as well as a few others). They will work harder and smarter to stay relevant and make money during this time. Think Amazon during the Dot Com bubble burst and how they survived it through smarter tactics.
It will be a hard time for the cosfame people to recover and find work during this burst. But the smart ones will rise. Besides, sex sells. People love seeing their waifus being lewd up by a sexy woman. The bubble will recover and the trend will start anew.
Larger conventions will become corporate. They will increase prices on badges and will become stricter to appeal to a boarder consumer. The possibility of these conventions losing their homely, fan feel is high. But do not dread! If there’s a positive to this then it’s the fact that these corporate conventions will have more money to bring in bigger names from the industry. Not every convention will go with the corporate flow. Smaller cons will still have their welcoming, personal home-like vibe and will refuse to do this.
Finally, we will see the end of the norimes who are bandwagon “nerds”. I see them out once either nerd culture becomes a part of everyday culture. They will stop caring after this. You already know that this will make the gatekeeping elitist nerds happy: seeing the normies whom once bullied them for liking anime out of their nerd club. Do I think this will bring us back to the old, golden days of the conventions? Possibly not.
Trends come and they go. The cosfame trend bubble will burst. We’re seeing upcoming social media personalities as big guests. Trust me: Do not sleep on them – social media is the new television. Conventions will become cooperate, and some will lose their classic fan feel. And the norimes who were on that fake nerd shit? They will go away.
Part 3: What Will Remain?
Tupac famously said that “some things will never change”.
We can say this about the convention community. Despite this community changing every day, (for better or for worse), there are some accepts that will never change. Humans are social creatures who thrive to connect with others. Conventions will always be a place for fellow nerds to come together. With that said, this also brings in drama. Drama will never end. People will always start shit and bring their beef to the conventions. Smaller and mid-size conventions will refuse to grow big and corporate. Those conventions will remind fan run. There will always be those who want to cosplay because they love to: not because they want money or fame. Opposite to that, cosfame and lewd cosplay will be hot; given that sex sells and people love money and will seek to gain it by any means in this capitalistic society.
Finally, what will remain are the various guests of the industry ranging from voice actors, online personalities, artists, creators, and so forth. We appreciate the people who gave life to our favorite characters through their vocal talents. We give much respect to the personalities who sit in front of a camera and passionately analyze their favorite series. We will continue to celebrate our favorite creators whom dedicated their lives and time to create such marvelous creations. Our love for these creators will never change.
Our love for this hobby is forever.
It’s interesting to speak about the future of the convention scene as we’re seeing the changes of the present impacting the unseen future. Currently, the cosfame appears to be a dominating force with the prize of money behind it. Larger conventions becoming corporate seem unavoidable, but some already saw this coming and accepted this. The unseen future reveals that social media stars of nerd culture could become major guests; as they’re growing ever popular. Change can be either scary or great – some will embrace it and work with it., Others will attempt to fight against the change and either become successful, or lose.
YouTuber’s illacertus’s states this about change in his animation summary of Robert Green’s book The 48 Laws of Power, and this is my closing statement:
Don’t fight change. When you catch yourself in the futile attempt to resists a new order, remind yourself that did you not only missed the opportunity to predict it, but to adapt to it in time.
You know what’s awesome? Having a Hilton Hhonors membership. A Gold tier membership at that. I don’t have to pay for breakfast as a perk. And goddammit, I need the early morning fuel. Can’t make fun of weeaboos on an empty stomach ya know. I mean, I could, but I’d pass out. I’d wind up in the hospital or something . That’ll be an unfavorable position; giving the weeaboos and the ACEN community the power to make fun of my dumbass mistake.
Can’t have that. No I cannot.
I’ll spare you useless details about my breakfast and jump to me meeting up with my boy “Alan” at the Hyatt.
Alan is one of my closest and bestest friend in the whole wide big ass fucked up world we call planet Earth. We’ve been buddies since high school (or about 13 years). Honestly, he’s somebody I can call a brother. Not a lover (I doubt his girlfriend would like that) but a brother. Check out his blog and give him a follow.
Alright, fuck this sappy heartwarming bullshit.
Alan needed to use my room to prep for his cosplay. There was time left before I had to check out from my Hilton room. However, he wanted to get stoned first before working on it. I like his idea. Smoke some trees and get right before we start the day. Funny enough, my new homeboy “Bill” wanted to smoke as well! Kill five birds with one stone. I, and I alone, can perform such a feat because I am Benjamin Snow the Greatest.
(I’m so full of it it’s not even funny)
As we waited for Bill’s arrival, an Incident Response Team (ACEN’s volunteer security team, or IRT) member approached me. Goddammit. It’s only a quarter to nine, and already, I’m in trouble. And fuck, I must be in deep trouble. Like I’ve done something illegal (not yet) trouble.
“Are you Benjamin Snow? I’m here to beat your ass for runnin’ your mouth online.”
I never imagined that somebody forreal would take my offer to confront and fight me in real life. Honestly, I was shock. I didn’t know how to respond. As my mind process what I should do, he followed up with
“Nah, I’m just playing. I’m Orion’s Belt, a Facebook friend of yours.”
Whew! Okay, I don’t have to assault an IRT member today. Not that I would actually do it any other time. Perhaps I will in a few years down the road when I have mental breakdown phase due to my B-list celebrity status.
We spoke briefly about my online persona, refering to me as the (in)famous Benjamin Snow to his teammate. (I kinda sorta hate it when people say I’m famous in the convention scene because I’m really not). He praised my legendary trolling skills are (they’re nowhere near legendary).
Look, I get that that you, the fans, admire me and everything, but please; stop calling me famous and legendary.
After exchanging farewells with Orion, Alan brought up that I have at least one IRT member in my network. That’s something huh? Being somewhat known in the community, I have a personal IRT acknowledgement. May it be one guy, but still my network is slowly becoming diversify.
Still waiting for Bill and wanting to pass time, Alan and I decided to create a cosplaying drinking for the convention. I think it’s a very easy game, take a shot for X cosplay Y series you spot at the convention.
The rules were as followed (taken from my original Facebook post):
‘ACEN COSPLAY DRINKING GAME. Take a shot for:
*Sailor Moon. Triple for Galaxia or Saturn or any evil Scouts. Take a Molly for a Molly (Naru) cosplayer. *Dragon Ball. Triple for Merged Zamasu or outside of Z/GT *Virgin Killer. Wendy’s. 4x if they work at that place. *Dragon Maid. Triple for male characters. Attack on Titan. Triple for Titans. *Touhou. Triple for actual female cosplayers *My Hero Acamedia *Overwatch *Final Fantasy 15 *Star Wars. *Street Fighter *Undertale *Pokemon *Rick and Morty. Nigga you may as well cosplay as Rick. *Soul Eater *Fate/Zero 5x for Saber cuz she’s the worse girl unlike Rin *Disney’
I, Benjamin Andrew Snow, do not claim responsibility for any idiots who may had die from this during ACEN. I’m just simply cleaning out the gene pool. Following the creation of the game, Bill finally arrived! About time nigga! To the smokers’ circle we go!
Anime Cental’s infamous smokers’ circle. A grey and stone grey circular structure, divided into 4-6 separate “pocket” spaces . It winds itself around Hyatt tower, supported by featureless pillars. Early morning, it’s pretty mellow. People tend to just chill, smoke, and drink coffee while reading the news, may it be old media (newspapers) or new (cellphones).
Nothing exciting happens around this time. I like it like that. I like the peaceful mellowness of a morning smoke.
We encountered Alan’s friends in the circle, inside one of the smaller pockets, cut into the support pillar. They were pregaming since Wednesday night, and claim they had broke into the convention center late that night. Jesus, maybe I should do that next year. Day -1 drinking and partying. However, breaking into the convention center for fun and exploration? Nah. They’ll shoot my black ass.
Real shit tho, Day -1 sounds like a great idea for exploring Downtown Chicago.
Once Alan and I got our minds right off the demon grass and devil’s wax, we marched back inside to the Hyatt, meeting up with two of our other friends. These friends, I’ve known very well through a secret Facebook group chat.
Our friends “Miku” and “Scotch”.
Miku is rather well known throughout the ACEN community due to her shitposting efforts (her level of shitposting isn’t as superior as mine) and unfortunately, drawing in the (creepy) thirsty fucks towards her. Thirsty fucks, she often has to reject on the daily. People lack personal boundaries. She’s an all-around cool girl.
Scotch, as his name implies, is a huge fan of scotch liquor, and has an expansive knowledge of top shelf liquors (thanks to getting me hip on that $40 whiskey fam). He does a commission work for cosplays. He’s pretty short, and looks about 20 despite being 30. That’s dem Asian genes for ya.
Since Alan and I had most of our crew together, we decided to check into our respected Hyatt rooms. However, our rooms weren’t ready yet. More sitting and looking awkward stupid! Go us!
Speaking of looking stupid, get this; I’m looking around my surroundings when I spot this dude with a red hat, white lettings, and a certain front and format. You get where I’m going with this right? No? Its okay readers, I didn’t expect you to get it.
I’m straight giving this white boy this vicious look. Like, I can’t fuckin’ believe this alt-right edgelords are forreal wearing these hates at the cons. Great. Trump supporters at muh SJW left wing ACEN. As I’m giving the guy my infamous death stare of doom, Alan was like “Dude chill, it says ‘Make Konami Great Again!’.
I want a hat like that now. I mean, Konami will never be great again, but I want it! Granted, I would probably receive some strange looks, and black people coming up to me and asking me if I’m on some coon shit. Ah well. Thanks Trump. Thanks Obama. Seriously thanks a lot guys.
Since neither Alan nor my rooms were ready, Scotch requested if Miku and I could help in carry some drinks form his car into his room in exchange for beers and shots. I’m down for free alcohol! Plus I was getting bored.
Look, if you want me to help you out, you gotta give me great shit. Alcohol. Weed. Food. Money. Sexual favors (18+ only). Or all five! I do not care! Just pay me in alcohol and I’ll help ya out things for ya.
Well, off we go! A black man, an Asian man, and a white chick together in harmony. Racial unity at ACEN (sans my racist comments and jokes)!
A wistful tone sat in as we walked thorugh the skybridge (it connets to multiple hotels and the convention center itself). Years ago, the skybridge was decorated with creepy, disturbing surrealism paintings. The hallway hosted eerie paintings; humans starring you down and unsettling landscapes. You felt at unease walking through the humid corridors, questioning if the painitngs are watching you. It wasn’t a great place to walk about intoxicated.
Today, the Hyatt’s skybridge is bland, just like your sex life.
As we trek through skybridge, we caught a glance of the enewly located, enormous, and dully illuminated game room. We didn’t see much of it, since Miku didn’t have her badge yet.
“I do not have my badge. I wish I could get inside, but I can only look.” Miku lamented.
“I wonder how many guys have said the same line about you.” Scotch replied in jest.
We all laughed at his diss towards Miku’s creepy fanboys. Poor Miku though. Can’t imagine how she has to deal with the creepy dudes on the ACEN groups. Seriously, ya niggas need to learn personal boundaries.
(By the way I’m totally stealing Scotch’s joke. I’m getting rich off that one when I start my comedy tour in 2020.)
Eventually, we reached Scotch’s car, which surprising wasn’t a rice burner as I was expecting it to be(goddamit Ben). We grabbed the goods (cases of Monster, Root Beer, and Pepsi), and headed to his room. Miku was struggling to carry the cases, due to her props and cosplay. Some nice young, dude came along to help her out. An extra party member to help us! What a nice fellow! He did depart after we got to his room. Kinda like in Final Fantasy 2 where the fourth party member is just a temp.
(In her words : “He probably saw a cute girl struggling, and wanted to help her out, in hopes he’ll hook up.” Something like that I don’t fucking remember.)
For my peerless efforts of the Great Soda Case March of 2017, Scotch rewards me with beers and a Bloody Mary! Thank you, Scotch! I needed the 1:00PM pregame, and an excuse to support my undying alcoholism. Alright! Got my mind right for the day. Alan hits up my line, telling me that his room is ready. I end my mission with one last beer (for the time being), and proceed towards Alan’s room for a nice, warm shower. Besides, I’d be a giant hypocrite for mocking unwashed weebs, yet I am unwashed myself.
As I head back to the Hyatt lobby , my eyes caught an offensive sight. Such a sight that will even enraged even more the most chill person.
“Ya crackas are really this bold this year, huh? Blackface? Really whiteboy?!” I’m infuriated. It’s 2017, and we still have people think it’s okay to wear blackface.
“This white boy is out in public, forreal in blackface. This cracker’s really fuckin’ using blackface for his cosp- wait it’s actually a black guy with an obvious skin condition. My lord I’m a piece of shit I need to stop doing this!”
Whew boy. Ben, what is wrong with you today? You know what, just go take your shower, because you need to wash away some shame, boy. Just go!
Alright! I’ve arrived at Alan and his fiancé “Emerald” room at last! Finally, I can take a shower, and after that, belittle all the other weeaboos who refuse to! They can’t say shit, because they smell like shit, and I won’t. Besides, I gotta smell good for all the fine ass kohai who want Benpai to notices them. I can’t disappoint them at all. Okay, maybe in bed, but that’s another story.
I gather my body wash and soap, hop in the shower, and got the Drake and Big Sean bumpin’ off the Bluetooth speaker. Drake and Big Sean are my biggest motivators for the convention (besides making money), especially with their song “Blessings.” I’m at ACEN for a goodtime and not a longtime. Get my networks right, make money off bartending the homeboy’s engagement party, have a cute, shy, quiet kohai get super happy I noticed her.
Hopefully one that’s cosplaying as one of my waifus (Rin from fate/zero, Misato from Evangelion, Sailor Saturn from Sailor Moon, or Sabrina from Pokemon to name a many, many few) take her back to my room, and fuck brains out from behind while she is in said waifu cosplay, moaning out my name in a hentai-like voice.
…A nigga can dream. Sigh. My luck with women is low despite my confidence (I’m so oblivious to flirting my lord.)
‘K. Out of the shower Benji. I get that you wanna be fresh and all, but that Irish Spring soap and bodywash gotta last you the entire weekend. But hey! Do you smell fresh as fuck, Ben! I’m feeling good. Finally, I can make fun of smelly weebs, and not be a hypocrite. To the con floor!
Or not. My phone start’s buzzing, the T-Moblie jingle plays off the speaker, and I pick up the phone.
“Eto…Moshi moshi. Benyamin Yuki des.” I answered in my most faux Japanese accent.
“What?” The hotel clerk responded. “Mr. Snow, you’re room is now ready! Please come by to pick up your room keys!”
“Please stop sir. You’re not Japanese.” The clerk hung up.
Damn. I was hoping to impress her with my fake Japanese accent, and butchering of the language. She sounded cute. That what I get for trying to flirt with everyone, including hotel clerks. Well, my room’s ready. Adrian and I need to drop our shit off, so off I go.
I enter the check-in line. Thankfully, it’s short. Good. The quicker I go through the line, and get into my room, the quicker I can make fun of nerds, to build my massive ego and arrogance up. Alright, finally it’s my turn! . I step up to the clerk, a cute woman with a purple wig. Awesome! Purple’s my favorite color! And hell, she sounded just like the woman whom I was failing to impress over the phone. Maybe if she notice how handsome and fresh I am, she’ll be sworn by my fake Japanese.
“Hi! I’m here to pick up my keys to my room!” I don’t know how to say that in Japanese, so I went for the English route instead.
“Here’s your keys Mr. Snow! You’re in the Executive Wing rom 2432! Enjoy the con!”
She hands the key over to me and send me on my way.
Wait, did I hear her right? Executive Wing!? As in, the exclusive large rooms only reversed for the most balling of niggas? And I only paid low tier room pricing for it? Fuck yea, this is gonna be a great ACEN! Let’s make it greater by flexing on niggas on Facebook (even though I didn’t pay full price for the room, and I had to stack, invest, and save money for the convention with extreme discipline)
Hooray for lying like I got it!
I’ve arrive at my room. It’s slightly larger than the normal rooms. The room featured two queen size beds, a nice marble table, an Eazy-Boy type chair, and shelves. Hey, at least the area is quiet; it’s not too far off from Alan’s room. Plus, I don’t have to deal with the infamous congested elevators of the main wing. I take this unexpected upgrade and it’s benefits!
My phone goes off again. It’s Adrian. He informs me that Alan, Emerald, and he were off to some store I don’t care about, and that it’ll take them a while to get back. Oh. I was hoping they’ll come with me to the liquor store. Guess I go myself. Back to theworld of weebs and normies.
I leave the building, ready to walk for twenty-four minutes for booze. Hold up! That black Nissan mini SUV parked out front with the Punisher logo on the back. Don’t tell me that’s…nah. That can’t be my boy “Punisher” (I’m running out of fake names to protect my friends). Holy fuck, I can’t be that lucky!
“Hey Ben what’s up man!” Yes! It’s my boy Punisher indeed! Cool country white guy from my home area. Man, I really am lucking out this year. If I can just throw him some gas money, I can totally not have to walk in the rain like a sad, lonely alcoholic nerd, and have him take me to the liquor store!
“Hey bro, could you take me to the liquor store? I’ll throw in some gas money or something!”
“Sure man, I didn’t want you to walk in this rain in the first place!”
Thank god for great friends.
Back to Rosemont Liqour. Now, common sense would had your boy to get all, it not, most of my alcohol when Joe had took me up there the day before, but I was waiting for extra money that I was owed to me from various people. Plus, I didn’t wanna spend any cash I had in my bank from the other day (just in case ya know).
Time to go shopping!
I have a main quest, and two side quests. The main quest requires me finding the indigents for an fishbowl-type drink Alan and Emerald requested me to make: Mermaid Water, a cocktail created by popular YouTube bartender “Tipsy Bartender”.
Here’s the details of the drink from his website:
‘The Mermaid Water Cocktail is the type of drink that will have you asking if you ever feel like a pirate. If you want to feel the gentle breeze of the ocean punch you in the mouth, then this is a drink for you. It is basically a bunch of delicious alcohol mixed with delicious juice. The exact sort of thing that pirates need when crossing vast seas of water in search of various forms of plunder.
Main quest easily completed, sans Punisher and I having difficulties finding Blue Curacao (which was in front of us, just on a lower shelf). Alright! Now onward to my first side question: the indigents to my new cocktail creation: Sailor Saturn.
Prior to ACEN, I planned to create a cocktail based off the Sailor Scouts from the anime and manga series “Bishoujo Senshi Sailor Moon”. I already made one based off my second favorite scout; Sailor Mercury (UV Blue Vodka, Blueberry liqueur, Sprite. Might throw in Blue Cuacao next time I make it. BTW OC dough nut steel), so I figure why not make one based off my first fictional crush favorite Sailor Scout of all time?
With the Sailor Saturn cocktail, I was thinking of going with aesthetic look; I needed either a purple colored liquor or liqueur to match her visual design. Next, I wanted to play off her powers of death and destruction, so I need liquors that represented destruction perfectly: 100 Proof Vodka and Hennessy.
(I was originally going to go with Everclear, but I also didn’t want niggas to think they’re a Solider of Destruction. I get that Hennything is possible but I didn’t want people dying off my shit. Ya can’t rebirth like Saturn)
Unfortunately (or fortunately), the store didn’t have 100 Proof vodka on stocked. Goddammit. But they had Hennessy! Go me…or I would say that, if I didn’t saw Martell Cognac for under $27 (special deal), as opposed to the $40 of Henny. Hennything is possible, including a discount on a competitor’s product! GO ME INDEED! I love saving me money and acting like a cheap ass! Plus, I never tried Martell before.
You gotta try new things. It’ll get you far. Trust me.
Next, was finding a purple colored liqueur. I wanted Hpnotiq Harmoic, which is an uncommonly known version of the original Hpnotiq. If you never had Harmoic, it’s congac, vodka, mixed berries, and I think lavender extracts. The lavender (and possibly mixed berries) provides Harmoic it’s purple color, which would had been perfect for the Sailor Saturn cocktail. Sadly, they also did not carry that version. Fuck. Looks like Saturn won’t be destroying anyone soo- hey what’s that beautiful purple glowing bottle with the white swirls liquor over there in the vodka aisle?
“Viniq? Oh wow, you’re so pretty.”
Yeah no, I’m using this for the cocktail. If you do not know what Viniq is like, here are some details from the official website (please sponsor me Viniq I’ll be your spokesman for the alcoholic weeaboos niche): ‘Sweet refreshing, and glamorous, VINIQ’s purple shimmer cathes your eye before you hit your glass. Bursting with peach, berry, and citrus flavors, it’s the perfect complement to any occasion’
(Viniq has mosacto wine infused with it, but the website forgot to mention that. Thought I throw that lil tidbit in there)
Cool. I’ll take it. Throw it in the basket with the rest of my booze and onwards to the second and final side mission: Dirty Princess Peach, a drink I created at ACEN 2015.
Dirty Princess Peach, (as the name suggest), is named after Nintendo legendary princess, Peach. Ya know, the woman who has a thing for giant Koopa cocks, had both kidnapping and imprisonment fetishes, and enjoys wearing, and showing off her lacy thongs while playing Tennis. There’s a reason why I’m calling her dirty.
I’m just going to post a link to the cocktail repiece below because I’m wasting time and I wanna get to the next scene asap.
Alright, got everything I need for the weekend. To the checkout line! Let me tell ya something; If you have a cart full of booze at the liquor store, you’re gonna get some looks and question. No lie: I love this part.
“Are you guys planning for a wedding party?” One guy asked in the check out line.
“Nah. Planning a party at a comic book convention.” I replied.
”Wait what? Comic book convention? Ya drink and party at those things?” The dude was bewildered. I blew his mind, man! I love it when people are surprise that us nerds party and drink heavy. I can’t lie; When I first got into the cosplay and convention scene, I was shocked that nerds drink, smoke, and party. The revelation changed my entire point on view on the nerd community.
I legit enjoy explaining to non-nerds how there are after parties, and many crazy shit that goes down during the conventions. Things that people would not associate nerds with. It legit get people interested in what we do.
Hey, if I can change one person’s bias about our community, then I guess I’ve done some good.
After paying for our stuff, Punisher and I headed back to the Hyatt. He had to go do something, so I was left alone with a heavy box of mixers and booze. Fun. I get to carry around a box of booze throughout the convention hotel with thousands of eyes on me like I’m 2pac. All eyes on me. Me and my box-‘o-debauchery!
Yes, I want all your attention! Watch me be Mr. Stongman carrying this heavy box with no effo- okay ouch there goes my back. And my legs are cramping up. Fuck I’m old. Oh great! Service carts! This will be easy! Just place this heavy ass box down and…
“Sir. We are a full service hotel. We have to carry your things for you.” An older black gentleman looks over at me as I attempted to lay my booze box on the cart.
‘Fuck.’ I thought to myself. I don’t have cash to tip him, but this is super heavy. Oh well.
“I can help you carry your alcohol up to your room if need be.”
“Sure.” Sigh. He’s gonna expect a tip, ain’t he? Don’t get me wrong, I tip service workers. Just that I don’t have cash, and I’d feel like a piece of shit if I didn’t tip him. I let him carry the cart through the hotel to a secret exclusive elevator for ballin’ niggas like myself (stay jealous). We hit the elevator from the bottom floor to the main lobby.
“So, how much this all run ya?” ‘Make up a complete lie Ben.’
‘Benjamin, you’re fucking stupid. He’s gonna press you for a tip you know how this game works.’
“I see you got Martell . That must have run ya .” Yep. Here’s the begging ass nigga asking for a tip in a few. Sigh. Broke niggas I swear.
“Yep.” I just replied back. Here we go.
We reached the main lobby. He took me over to another attendant. Before he took me over to him, he finally pop the question. I’m the luckiest man in the world!
“So, you gonna tip me?” He begged.
‘Nigga. What kinda bullshit is this? If I was a white boy you wouldn’t be on this crabs-in-a-bucket shit.’
“Yea…where’s the ATM?” He just points behind me towards the ATM. I follow his finger to the ATM, and withdrew a $20. 10 for him and his coworker, an older white gentleman.
“Ya got change?” I asked. The white attendant had change alright. And by change I mean some bands. Like 1s, 20s, a few 50s. I take it he gets all the tips. I doubt he’s on some begging shit. He gives me two 10s, allowing me to tip them both the 10. The second attendant helps me to my room with the booze.
“Which room are you in?” He asked
“2432”. I replied back.
“Ahh, you must have a party room huh? No wonder you have so much alcohol.
“Heh heh yeah! I’m just having a smallish party with some friends, nothing major.” I replied with a sly smile. Boy, I’m helping my friends host a rager old man!
Back on the trek to my room! We head to another secret side elevator, pasting the mess of the overflowing elevators. An older white IRT lady caught a quick glance of my box-o’-debauchery, and gave me the most “I fucking parties like you” look I’ve ever received from a con staff. I dunno if it just she was jealous she had to work all weekend, or she thinks I’m gonna get caught slippin’ with my party, but holy that bitter white woman death glare man!
Bitch you’re getting mad! I’m having fun!
Finally, after that bullshit, we arrive at my room! I thank the guy and we went our separate ways. I pull out the Viniq first. I want to taste this alluring, enticing, sparkling violet liquid. I take a small shot. My lord, the taste of Viniq is astonishing. Delicate and sweet like Hotaru Tomoe. And yet, destructive and dangerous like Sailor Saturn.
…My weeaboo ass just fucking compared alcohol to a fucking Japanese anime character. Whew lord I need Jesus. Or another shot of this Viniq, this is good as fuck. Wait hold up, it’s almost 6:00PM. As much as I wanna get a little tipsy, I gotta meet up with some very old friends from my first Anime Central. My day ones from my first cosplay group: The Umineko and Higurashi cosplay group.
I’m gonna save that for the next post. Eleven pages and nearly 4700 plus words is more than enough for night. Day 1 will be split into two parts (with this being part one of course). Stay tune in the future in which I take a short delicious food detour before meeting up with the Higurashi and Umineko cosplay group! Following that, I will introduce ya to one of my favorite Chicago citizen and I’ll treat ya to my wild partying lifestyle! Oh and the part on how hard I really had to chill out before killing somebody who I thought was my friend.
All that, plus not that much more, next time! I’ll post a link the Part 2 once I am finish with it! Be good ya’ll!
Ahh Anime Central. Chicago’s ultimate otaku convention for partying and debauchery. It’s a great convention to find hard drugs like coke and acid. There’s alcoholic beverages flowing about. Take a few shots for liquor courage to dick down that Cecilia cosplayer! Hey, Gotta celebrate Fire Emblem Gaiden’s 3DS remake somehow. There are also Persona orgies hosted by a kinky Shadow Rise cosplayer hunting down guys to run a train on her. ACEN has the great shit for ya if you want it.
Oh yea, they have cosplaying nerds who ain’t fuckin each other in orgies and industry panels. That shit is boring. As an (somewhat) honest person, I’m gonna tell you what really goes down outside the panels and normal convention shit. Autograph and photo sessions? Pfft. I rather waste time on my grind, writing passion, and networks. Why? So the anime and video game industry can notice my hardwork. I want to become lifelong friends with the niggas you stand in line for hours just to talk to them for twenty seconds out of your life.
Look, fuck all that lame boring shit that the average con attendees will tell. I’m here to too you the the real grimy shit. You can trust me on keeping it real. I’m a real nigga.
My friend “Adrian” (name changed because I’m the star and he’s not) and myself arrived in Chicago at 2:00pm Thursday afternoon after a long 10 hour trip from St. Louis via Amtrak. You see, Amtrak was running a special deal. Riders will have to suffer through delays and constant route changes with no explanations!
Something about a fatal train derailment was thrown in, but we didn’t get that option. Oh well. Public transit is better than Amtrak. You don’t get that fine Chicago-style piss smell on the Amtrak unlike Chicago’s CTA public transit. CTA ride was nice, sans some homeless diabetic begging money for heroine. Or was it insulin? I dunno I don’t do (hard) drugs, and I’m not hip on the new and upcoming drug trends.
Following that 45 minute ride, we arrived at Rosemont, Il! Home of Anime Central. Yes! Finally I can make my grand announcement to my haters that the guy they secretly want to fuck but can’t has arrive! The guy who they want to fight, but are too pussy to step up because they can’t carry their keyboards around.
It’s me: Benjamin Snow. I am the greatest otaku to have ever lived (one day I’ll snatch the Otaking title away from Toshio Okada) . I am the promised child of otaku culture niche, whom the prophets once warned the basement dwelling beta white cuck virgins weeaboos. I am the main character of my haters’ lives. I am the anti-hero protagonist of this tale.
I’m honored that you, the reader and haters, are focused on me. All eyes on me.
Adrian (I almost forgot about him) and I checked into our hotel, the Hilton, which is right across from the Hyatt, the main Anime Central hotel. Hilton’s a nice hotel chain for lodging space. Not a nice company to work for however unless you’re a masochist who hates their life. Oh wait I forgot you ain’t supposed to talk shit about shitty companies you used to work for. Actually, I take that back. Hilton’s 3rd party contractors can be hit or miss. Not the company itself.
Fuck you, Lodging Hospitality Management.
Grudges and come up revenge aside, my boy and I got a top floor room. We’re top tier men so we gotta be at the top. After showering (not with Adrian, that’s pretty gay), I decided to head to the Hyatt to scan the place for anyone I know. Encounter another homeboy, “Joe”. Joe’s a cool guy who I really wish I could hang out with more often despite we live in the same city. Big black guy fighting game fan such as myself. After some small chat we decided to roll out to Rosemont Liquor, a super nice liquor store in Rosemont that you already know is gonna love the money they racked in from us alcoholic weeaboos.
Went in and brought a bottle of pineapple New Amsterdam, a pack of 312 Goose Island Wheat, and big boy beer: My first 12% beer in my life. Trust me, drinking 12% beer is like smoking some fire ass kush after smoking that weak ass reggie for years on end. Forgot the name of the beer but they’re not sponsoring me nor this blog, so it doesn’t matter.
Following, Joe and I drove back to my hotel. During the drive, we spoke about fighting games, with Casual Player Neglect Fighter V being the main topic (Street Fighter 5) and how garbage it lowkey is. I brought up how for some reason despite not playing in months, I was able to beat my friendes who play nearly everyday with Karin.
Oh Capcom. I hope one day, you guys figured out why nobody enjoy this game.
Joe dropped me off at my hotel, as he had prior plans with a friend. Cool with me, given I had plans to kick it with another friend, “Vance”, and his Touhou cosplay crew at Hofbrauhaus. I “met” Vance back at my first ACEN in 2013 as he was cosplaying as Momiji (from Mountain of Faith or whatever idunno I don’t play Touhou like that). His outfit and the craftsmanship of it was amazing, and (at the time) Momiji cosplays were rather uncommon, so your boy had to take his pic. I would not realized I met him at ACEN until later.
I officially met and hung out with Vance at Anime Crossroads 2013, at his Touhou Panel he was hosting. We spoke about the series, our love for alcohol, and the convention scene in general. We naturally clicked and overtime, he became a good con friend. On some real shit, I wouldn’t mind being friends outside of cons with the dude…if I didn’t live in St. Louis but there’s always non-con traveling plans. Enough of my longing for networking with folks, to Hofbrauhaus
Hofbrauhaus’s food is amazing. I could tell you the fantastic variety selection of dishes and drinks they have , but my black ass is too lazy to look up their menu online. Settle with a picture of one of their dishes I that cannot for the life of me pronounce. I’m an American. Not German. We speak American in America.
After showcasing my quietness to people I don’t know outside my established friends in the group (I’m lowkey shy around strangers) and appropriating German culture (because I’m slightly racist), I walked back to my hotel and holy fuck! It’s fucking cold and windy as fuck outside! You see, my dumbass thought it would had been a great idea to wear a light T-shirt and shorts earlier in the day, despite knowing the fact the tempts were dropping..
I’m pretty sure some folks saw me walking around shivering in shorts and a t-shirt and were like “This stupid ass nergo.” Okay, I hope not. Rosemont is mostly white people, and they don’t have the right to say Nergo. Kinda like how I don’t have the right to make racist jokes about the Germans in a German restaurant (inside my head of course). Das boot! Big titty thick Germans girls wearing those Dirndi dancing with giant beer mugs! I swear I’m not racist towards Germans!
…fuck I’m racist.
I arrived back to my hotel to change into some warm clothes. Perhaps the harsh winds were karma for my inner-racism, but oh well. To help prove to myself I’m not a complete racist, I took up an offer to kick it with my white friend, “Beared Chibi-Usa” at ACEN’s infamous smoker’s circle. Great source for debauchery. And drugs!
Bearded Chibi-Usa, as his name implies, is a guy who has a beard and cosplays as Chibi-Usa from the Bishoujo Senshi Sailor Moon series. Maybe he’s actually cosplaying an alternate timeline of Chibi-Usa, who is actually a female-to-male transgender, and they have a beard. Who fuckin’ knows. All I know is that this man is cool ass businessman and has his own online advertisement company. Make that new money young nigga.
During our chill and smoking (tobacco) session, we overheard a rather interesting conversation between two guys talking about a stillborn dead ass baby. So, this loud ass guy was broadcasting how he may or not had been cucked by his (ex?) girlfriend at the time, and how his girlfriend felt so bad about it that she let the guy have pity sex with him. Like, raw dog busting all types of nuts inside the girl’s pussy pity sex with a creampie ending.
As we all know, sex makes babies. Sometimes, stillborn babies. Hey, that’s life. Some win. Some lose.
Despite people giving this guy confused looks and laughing at him, he kept going with the damn story. Bearded Chibi-Usa and I exchanged “what the fuck” looks and walked away, trying to contain our laughs to no anvil. We needed to drink after that, man. That was too much for us and this was day zero. A fuckin’ Thursday night.
People; keep your personal business about being a cuck with a stillborn baby to yourselves. I will laugh at you.
To keep your mind off how much of a fucked up piece of shit person I am for laughing at that poor guy, let’s go back to a certain point of this story. Remember how I told ya Beared Chibi-Usa is a businessman? Well, some non-nerd businessman got on my boy case for being him; a nerd. I don’t remember much of the details due to the alcohol and drugs, but I recall him shutting their ass down, talking about how he’s a businessman himself and that his company has clients from the companies the non-nerds work for.
Needless to say, he shut their ass down. Ya non-nerds should really let go of the stereotype of the broke basement nerd still in their parents’ basement. But hey, they’re old fucks. They have about what? 20-30 years of life left, and us young folks are gonna take their jobs overtime. No big deal.
We settle back to my room and we spoke upon various topics, such as grime rap, weight lost, and business. Grime rap. My god, no wonder it has that name. Angry. Aggressive. Blunt. Take what you know about (real) hip-hop culture, give it steroids and make it British. No, not fucking high class sip tea and eat crumpets British. I’m talking the low income, brutal lifestyle of the the British. Rap battles taking place inside decaying buildings and under bridges. Harden street rappers going berserk with their personal attacks against rivals and enemies. You got your feelings hurt? Fuck you, you’re a grime rapper. Suck it up.
No wonder my boy got me hip to this genre. I can see myself bumping this type of music and applying the story behind the music in my writings. I get inspired easily ya know. Speaking of, his talk about business, and how his networks pretty much inspired me to work on my grind, hustle, and brand. Here’s a young dude around my age with his own company, out here making moves and great money. I’m sitting here listening about his work. I’m like “man, if he can do it, so can I.” Granted, it takes hard work, dealing with self-doubts, and overcoming both haters and personal failures to reach what you want in life. This shit doesn’t come overnight.
I’m dragging this story with nonsense filler and I pretty sure you guys want me to talk more about partying and less about my sappy self being inspired. A couple of more folks came over to pregame (who I won’t mention because my uncreative ass can’t come up with fake names). I think we played the godawful broken Sailor Moon Super S fighting game on my laptop, as well as a real fighting game like Super Street Fighter 2. I got bodied in both because alcohol. One of my friends noticed my Sailor Saturn sticker on my laptop and we had a nice chat about why we like and relate to her (socially awkward but love having few but very close friends). Come to think about it, I honestly forgot what happened from between me light partying and when I woke up the next morning.
Fuck it, onto Day 1. A day in which gave me more inspiration from dudes doing better than myself, an convention and hotel staff hating on my alcohol collection, and me having to control my temper to prevent killing somebody who I thought was a friend.
For the convention season, please take a shower or bath before you head to an anime/comic/sci-fi con. Nobody is trying to smell your nasty, unwashed, unclean ass because you refuse to take care of basic personal hygiene. Body odor is not cute and nobody isn’t trying to get sick because your ass do not wanna hop in the shower for 15 minutes and put on some deodorant.
Trust me, I legit had asthma attacks from overpowering B.O. from unwashed nerds at cons. It ain’t fun.
It is 2017 and i should not tell people this but this is the state of the convention community as of this writing. Hell there’s even a debate on the Anime Boston Facebook group on if people should shower before heading to a convention. An convention group. Having a debate. On if you should shower or not.