Hello dear readers and friends,
I’m glad to announce that I’m half-way through my “25 Days of Blogging” goal . Constantly writing article after article for the past 14 days or so been a joy for me as it has instilled much needed discipline for myself as I churn out written content nearly each day.
I say “nearly” because for the past two days or so, I’ve been slacking a bit. By now, I should had been up to Day 16, not Day 14. This is due to working a hectic Holiday schedule at my job. Christmas is less than a week away. People want to buy gifts for their love ones. Working at a retail store means most of my time is eaten up by the Holiday work week. Some days, usually weekends, I am tired and my sleep schedule becomes weird. I need about 6-9 hours a night for sleep, or I’m going to be drained for the workday instead of alert.
Twenty-year-old me could pull a 11 hour workday followed by banging out an article all night; going to bed at 2am or 3am instead of 9pm or 10pm. Me, at age thirty? I would hate life if I pulled that knowing I need my rest (or change my diet and reduce time on everything). Now, that I think about it, it’s my fault that I’m in this situation. I always knew I’d hate working for somebody else, even as a youth.
Let’s go back twenty years ago. Yuki: Age 10.
“So you’re going to play with an orchestra when you grow up?”
“Nah. I rather be a solo act than work for an orchestra. More freedom for me to travel the world alone.”
Fast forward seven years later. Yuki: Age 17.
“You wanna work for a video game company if you get into game design in college?”
“Nope. I make my own game company instead after college through networking with others globally.”
Man, young Yuki was smart. Then, due to fears and insecurities, he listened to the wrong people who had his “best” interested in mind.
Translation: I should have gotten the game before letting the game get me.
I felled into the rat race. Went straight to college over the workforce. Should had entered the workforce and generated income eariler. Even my teacher warned me that it would be better for me to go into the workforce and networking through the workforce, then, either deccing if I wanted to do college to get my degree, or never go into college and grow within an industry, then leave it after learning skills. Being the idiot that I was, I listened to my parents over my teacher. Big “mistake” full of fruitful lessons after college – and I learned the lessons after I had dropped out of college — not at college.
Long story short to be covered in the future: Entered college after high school. Me, somewhat sheltered naive kid from a Black Christian household (Pentecostal Christian…yea), discovers weed, drinking, and the party life style of college. Add to that, discovering anime conventions around this time. I had no discipline for anything – school included. Started skipping classes. Grades slipped. Got into debt. Had to pay debts off. Went back to school. “This is it! I won’t fuck up as last time!” Start fucking up again. Repeat.
Decided to enter the workforce full time three years after that. I also did school, but took a lighter load of only class a semester (English one semester, audio the second, and Japanese 101 the last). Did much better. Plus, I cut off all the people who never had my best interest in mind because they were doing the same shit everywhere and weren’t aware of it. I enjoyed working for a bit, but I was lacking one particular thing: discipline. I could be a good worker when I wanted to, but distractions got in the way. More money meant more “options”.
Instead of saving my money to build what I want (hardware for recording music, a laptop, etc.that would put me on a path of having my own), I spent money on short-term pleasure: smoking weed, alcohol, video games, fast food, hanging out with friends, going to conventions. You name it. I guess I was making up for “lost” time that I didn’t have in high school (always studying, not being allowed to have a job until I kept my grades up: so no funds for what I wanted). Eventually, as I got older, I realized that maybe I should had saved up and done this wild shit later rathe.
At 30, I’ve come to realized that I played myself and betrayed my younger self’s goals of never working for anyone but myself. I let the game get me, rather than getting game. My lack of discipline got the best of me. Sure, I needed a job to survive, but what I should had done in my college days was work on myself, build a network with like minded people, and dropped out of college much earlier.
Or never went to college in the first place and entered the work field as soon as graduated high school. If I went into the work force straight out of high school, started business building earlier (due to the lack of distractions) I would be writing this blog post somewhere in Ethiopia chilling in the Motherland, Japan while I’m getting ready to report on Winter Comiket, England just because, or Los Angeles as a digital nomad traveling the world. Hell, I would have anime conventions fly me out and pay for my hotel rooms as a guest at their convention because they love my analytical blog posts on anime (okay, that’s a bit wishful thinking)
Instead, I’m just now planting the seeds to escape the rat race – seeds that should had been planed back in 2008 – not 2017. But, better late than never as they say. Some people wake up at age 18. Some, age 27. However, for all I know, this was supposed to happen. Maybe I was suppose to fuck up in my 20s so I know what I shouldn’t do in my 30s.
Perhaps the universe wanted me to be aware of shitty people in my 20s that I brought into my life due to my lack of discipline and fears of not being social so I have the information, knowledge, and tools to make sure worse people wouldn’t enter my 30s as I’m business building. It’s cool, I needed life to kick my ass a couple of times to discipline my mind. I needed to be careless in my youth so I don’t be as reckless in my later years. Thankfully, I haven’t done anything to completely fuck my 20s up, so I can take a lot of risks that the average late 20/early 30 something can’t.
Plus, they say your 30s is the true best time of your life – not your 20s.
Until Next Time.
-Yuki The Snowman.