Sayori DDLC – Yuki The Snowman

Yuki’s Path to Doki Doki Literature Club’s Good Ending – Round 1: Sayori

You know, I truly believe that you can earn your happy ending in life – but only if you work and grind your ass off for it. Video games (with multiple endings) drive this point home hard. If you truly want that happy ending, then you have to go through hell to obtain it. Doki Doki Literature Club is no expectation. In order to get the game’s true/golden ending, we gotta go through hell first. Well, okay we already went through hell once. Let’s do it again.

‘Paradise starts in hell.’
-Tim Grover

To start, I’m going to tackle Sayori’s route first. There’s a CG I have yet to obtain (at the time of this writing) from her route. Plus, her cheerful attitude grown on me. The too pure cinnamon bun thing, ya know? Also, gonna name myself after my PC (“OWNER) to see if Monika detects that lol.

Let me say this: Thank god for the skip text option. Because fuck; I ain’t spending another two hours of my life reading all that bullshit in her route. For some situations, I did read some of her lines and what others have to say about Sayori. It’s strange: when you consume media for the first time, you do not pick up on the subtle clues the creator(s) hid within the art. It’s only when you consume and experience it multiple times is when you start to pick up on the things that were once hidden. Seeing how Sayori wanted to cheer everyone up to hide her depression and pain not only made sense, it was heartbreaking.

Monika mentioned that it was surprising to read Sayori’s poems on the topic of sadness as it was opposite to her normal cheerful personality. Saying the obvious (Sayori conceals her depression from the club) is stupid so I won’t go into those details. It does make you think about the people in your lives who are always happy and want to cheer everyone up.

Are they truly happy, or is their happiness a mask to hide their pain to make people not worry about them?

DDLC 2018-03-22 02-08-20-49.png — “I could sleep forever.” That was the first clue.

Skipping through the dialogue I came across one of the two most important choices I need to make for this route: Would I rather walk back home with Sayori or Yuri. In my original walkthrough, I selected Yuri (personal bias). That was one of the catalyze that worsen Sayori’s depression. In retrospect, I can understand how that fucked with Sayori’s head. I am not a mental health expert or anything, but seeing how Sayori reacted to that, I can only guess that she felt that she was a burden to the MC as well as her feeling worthless. She probably started to overthink the situation and believed MC was pushing her away to hang out with Yuri (or any other club member). Again, I do not know if that how depression works.

If anyone could be kind enough to correct me let me know.

I went with the “I’d still walk with Sayori” option. I think I’m doing well. I hope. The third round of poem writing seems to get harder. The dark and depressing words seem to relate to Yuri more than Sayori, but I still got reactions from Sayori. I’m starting to think the game knows I’m save scumming lol. The day after, the club starts to prep for the festival. Sayori is sitting alone as normal with her head bury in her desk.

At this point, you can sense that her depression is hitting harder as she once again does her façade of trying to make her crew not worry about her. Perhaps it is because I am more in tune with my emotional/creative side of my brain, but I can’t help but feel bad about her and think about my friends who are battling depression. Honestly, that shit breaks my heart and I feel helpless when I can’t help my friends feel better about themselves because of how cruel mental health illnesses are.

Maybe that’s why her character has grown on me on this second playthrough. Ha.

You know you’re dedicated to getting a good end when you panic and freak out thinking you fucked up. When the MC goes to Sayori house to check up on her, I started to think “Oh shit I made a mistake this is the suicide scene!”. Then I remember that scene came a little bit later in the game so I still have time to do my save scum shit. But nah, the first time MC goes over to Sayori’s house, she reveals that she has lifelong depression.

This could be fate or just by chance, but I had my hip-hop instrumental playlist playing in the background. The next song in the cycle was 2pac’s Pain from the movie Above The Rim. Fitting. Sayori dealt with (mental) pain all her life. We’re now seeing her tell her best friend about it. There’s a sample from one of the Star Trek movies that are used in Pain. I think it goes: “‘I couldn’t help but noticed your pain!’” “’My pain?’” “’It runs deep – share it with me!’”

(If I could get away with it, I would make a music mod of DDLC that uses 90s hip-hop music. Pain would be perfect for Sayori revealing her depression to MC).

‘Why do we die at an early age?
‘Why there’s so much pain?’
‘Tired of the strain and the pain’

Yea. Those lines work well with DDLC.

For preparations for the festival, I selected Natsuki to help me out . I have yet to have any interactions with me from my first run through so I thought it would be best to check her shit out. But since this is a Sayori-centric path, I’m gonna save my notes/thoughts on Natsuki for her path. I do like Natsuki’s softer side though and she seems mellower than what she puts out on the surface. Mellow Natsuki best Natsuki.

(I will like to say that the instrumental of Drake’s “Pound Cake” goes well with the baking scene between MC and Natsuki. Yes. Puns were intended.)

Now, finally, I arrived at the single most important point of this path; Telling Sayori if I love her or if I should put her in the friend zone. In a normal run-through (without a guide), either decision led to Sayori’s suicide. In that regard, telling Sayori you love her only to have her kill herself the next day hurts harder than simply telling her that she is your best friend. Pretty fucked honestly. In any case, I manage to unlock two CGs I needed for this path for the golden ending so I’m gonna dip out.

Next: Natsuki.

By Yuki The Snowman Posted on May 15, 2018

Doki Doki Literature Club 0

Yuki’s Doki Literature Club Adventures: Act 4 – Bad Ending (Freewrite)

‘This game will not have a happy ending.’
-Bernkastel, Umineko no Naku Koro ni

Major Spoilers: I lied. Sayori is the final boss.
Warning: You should already know by now I play this game and write about it drunk.

I was warned that DDLC wouldn’t have a happy ending. I shouldn’t sweat it too much; given I’m a fan of Umineko no Naku Koro ni: A 07^th Expansion visual novel that too didn’t end happily. The first half of my favorite Fire Emblem game, Fire Emblem 4: Genealogy of the Holy War, also didn’t end well. And my favorite Persona game, Persona 3, had a depressing ending. (Jesus fuck, maybe I’m secretly sad that’s why I like downer endings) Did I spoil myself on the bad ending for DDLC? Yes. But, I think by spoiling it, it drove me to finish the game (to see how sad and depressing the game ending is). To tell the truth, I love it when consumer media concludes with a downer ending. The happy ending thing is played out. Fuck that happier ever happy shit.

Sometimes, you need a reminder of how brutal and unfair life can be.

The movie been out for almost a month. Don’t bitch about this spoiler.

After killing Monika I restarted the game. It started as normal, expect Monika isn’t on the title screen. Yay! The wicked bitch is dead! The game resume starting with act 1 like nothing happened expect the recently revived Sayori is now the president….Shes’ gonna be self-aware like Monika, isn’t she?

In any case, MC — rather, the player – joins the Literature Club. Given Sayori’s position on the screen, she is the club’s president. Yuri is on her left, so I’m assuming she retains her vice-president role. The BGM is the title screen music. Ya know, with the piano playing the melody. Didn’t Monika play the piano? Hold up…

Sayori gets all happy that the MC has joined her club. You know, it’s kinda depressing: Sayori is happy Everyone is acting normal like they didn’t go through the chaos from Monika. Yet, we the players knew what these girls went through. We know what is to come. And there’s nothing we can do about it.

Sucks, doesn’t it?

As the girls celebrate the formation of the club, I couldn’t help but notice how more friendly Natsuki and Yuri are towards each other. In Act 2 they were at each other throats, belittling one another and judging their hobbies. In Act 4 however, they seem to respect one another, with Yuri wanting to learn more about manga and Natsuki wanting to learn about novel through Yuri. What did I say in my Act 2 Part 2 writings? Natsuki and Yuri could get along and become close friends – best friends even.

(To tell the truth, I’d love to see a mod or a non-h doujin with Natsuki and Yuri as they form a powerful bond. Natsuki could help Yuri overcome her fears, become more confident with herself, and fight her bullies. Yuri could help Natsuki learning about the arts.)

As MC and Sayori speak about how fun the club will become, Sayori thanks me (not MC), for getting rid of Monika. I start to freak out as I’m still drunk from writing my Act 3 shit and the music becomes creepy and distorted. Doesn’t help that I’m wearing earbuds that are programmed to be bass boasted.

I made a terrible mistake, haven’t I?

I’m prepping myself for any jump scares or freaky shit so I may become sober as we get deep into this post. Which probably is a catch 22 because Sayori revealed that she knew Monika did all the horrible things she did to the girls and the player. She talks about how MCI made her the happiest girl in the world…hold up, didn’t Monika said some shit like this as well? Please don’t tell me I gotta deal with another murderous nutjob girl who trying to get with the MC. I already had enough of that bullshit for one play through.

Sigh…do I have to delete another yandere bitch? To quote a 90s Nickelodeon co-star “Awww here it goes!”

I’m sure the game knows I don’t wanna go through this bullshit again because the first choice of this act is “No.” Thank you game, I appreciate you. Sayori’s spelling out “FOREVER” was creeping me the fuck out. Hold up, the game isn’t saving me…it’s Monika.

Even this game was like “Yea no let’s not go through any more bullshit.”

Monika starts to hakai Sayori, the club, and the entire game. After that, she starts to sing the game’s ending theme and the credits roll. Apparently, I’m missing a few CG shots (given I have yet to tackle the Natsuki route and I didn’t fucking save scum). Sigh…fuckin’ bad endings.

Continued in Yuki’s Revenge Against This Fuckin’ Entry Level VN.

By Yuki The Snowman Posted on May 14, 2018

Doki Doki Literature Club 0

Yuki’s Doki Doki Literature Club Adventures: Act 2 Part 2 (Freewrite)

Warning: Major spoilers for Act 2. Gory imagery of your dead, entry-level visual novel waifu below. Adult themes. Written while under the influence of alcohol.

I dunno if I mentioned this yet, but Yuri is my favorite character in DDLC. I can to relate to her issues (overthinking, worrying about what others think about me, etc). I used to find it hard to open myself to others due to my own problems of being bullied for being weird (took me years to overcome this). I can talk about the things I love with strong passion for hours. I get happy when I find people who appreciate me and my work.

Now, with that out of the way, can I say that Yuri is fucking crazy as fuck? Did this bitch forgot to take her meds before coming to school? Why does she need to carry a pocket knife around school for? Why did she felt the need to bring up Natsuki’s abuse; all because she wouldn’t win an argument against her? And if she couldn’t be even lower, she tells Monika to kill herself to reveal her stress.

Bitch got issues.

I don’t think that’s how that works, Yuri.

Today’s Yuki Adventures in DDLC won’t have much substance. Been lackin’ due to work. Therefore, this post is based off my ever fading memories (thanks to alcohol and weed). There won’t be as much excitement as my past DDLC adventure posts.

I left off with Monika telling MC that Yuri likes to cut herself (to deal with her emotions) and that I saw something he shouldn’t see. Now, my thing is this: If Monika knows Yuri cuts herself, why doesn’t she help her friend out? Tell her to seek a therapist or somethin’ fam. Ah well. After that, Monika theorizes that Yuri may be cutting herself for sexual pleasure.

Alright, Yuri is into some things. I remember my homegirl telling me that Yuri is freaky. But I didn’t know she was that freaky. Knifeplay is one thing (since you [usually] have to use a dull knife for such acts – don’t ask how I know I just know). But cutting yourself to get off? Yea, no that’s crazy.

Yuri, stop it. Get some help.

Monika concludes with that I should spend more time with her because she’s sane. Monika, sane people don’t call themselves sane. They especially don’t tell their friends to delete their other friends. Oh yea, Monika wanted me to delete Yuri and that it’ll be a difficult decision. Nah, what’s difficult is dealing with a crazy girl who’s plotting against her friends because she can’t get her crush to fuck her. That, and actually deciding if I wanna delete Yuri just to see if I unlocked a path. Of course, the game has a habit of deleting your saved files (because being annoyed that you lost your files when you need to take notes for your blog is true psychological horror…) so I decided against Monika’s wishes.

Monika rants about how much she cares about the MC/me/whatever I don’t care anymore and how we’re the only real people in the club (lazy foreshadowing). She’s not doing a great job at hiding the fact she’s the villain and wants to kill her digital friends. She may have many talents, but hiding her intentions ain’t one of them.

Nah, you’re faker than them Jordans you find at those dirty ass flea markets.

Yuri pops up and pulls MC to the side to ask him some stupid questions. First, she asks him if he noticed Monika’s recent strange behavior. I wanted to say “Yes, you fucking idiot she’s been plottin’ against all y’all since day 1 she is actin’ strange!” but I doubt she could hear me (despite DDLC’s genius level fourth wall breaking gameplay). But yes Yuri, to answer your question Monika has been acting strangely lately. Next, she asked if she’s not crazy or anything.

Well, Yuri, here some things thing:
1. You did lick and suck the MC’s finger clean of blood (after he cut himself on your knife).
2. You’re into knives. Not only that, you get off to the danger of knives.
3. When you were reading with the MC, you started to breath heavy.
4. You touched yourself to MC’s poem and did things to your own poem that I can’t go into full details because this isn’t an adult WordPress site (more on that later)
5. You made Natsuki cry.
5B. You said that nobody would cry or miss her if Natsuki killed herself.
6. You told Monika to kill herself.

Bitch. You’re fuckin’ crazy.

If I was the MC, I’d tell her she is, but that would run the risk of being stabbed to death by her. Yanderes don’t like being called what they are. As the two talk about how much of a fake, slimy snake Monika is guess who pop up a totally heard MC and Yuri’s conversation (because these two idiots didn’t just go further down the hall away from the club to talk shit)? Monika! Personally, I was hoping Monika would grab Yuri by her hair and start beating the shit outta her (for talking that shit behind her) but I didn’t make the game. Look: if you’re gonna talk shit about somebody, make sure they can’t hear you.

Kids: This is how people wind up on World Star Hip Hop fight compilations.

Some shit happen that I don’t remember so let’s pretend something happen between that scene and the next poem review scene. Natsuki comes up to MC with her “poem”. Strange, given she hates the poems I make the MC write (because I’m not a weeaboo like her) but MC accepted anyway. Here, we’re are given a look at Natsuki’s softer side. Instead of a poem, Natsuki gives dude a note about Yuri’s strange behavior. It’s revealed that Natsuki secretly cares for Yuri and it hurts her to see Yuri acting abnormally. She wants to help and befriend Yuri but fears Yuri will snap on her (due to their conflicting history).

I’m not shock by this. Yea, Natsuki is a tsundere and that was tsundere do. However, Natsuki’s concerns for Yuri make sense if you compare the two. They’re relentless about their passions. They’re often misunderstood. They will fight to the bitter end in what they believe in. The two tend to hide their issues from others. They will only reveal their true, softer side to those who they can trust.

I can totally see them being close, if not, best friends.

Natsuki and Yuri reading manga together.

But they won’t. Because Just Fuckin’ Monika. After Natsuki snitched on herself that she actually cares about people, the game starts glitching madly. The text box is spam with the words “Just Monika” over and over until the game “reset” to the title screen. Then, I’m greeted with more “Just Monika” text.

The game resumed per “normal”. MC gave his poem to Yuri and she reads over. Yuri starts to praise it. She loves it. Loves it so much that she tells MC that she’s gonna take it home and fuck herself while reading it. For real, the fuck is wrong with Yuri? After gushing (probably literally) over MC’s poem, she gives him her poem – which is covered in her blood and what I can only guess is either urine or dried up female ejaculatory fluids. And said poem is endowed it with her scent.

I am pretty sure Yuri may have sexually harassed the MC.

Following that, Monika speaks to MC about spending the weekend with her instead of the other girls. Yuri (obviously) didn’t like that idea and goes off on Monika. Yuri calls the kettle black and accuses Monika of being jealous. Then she asks her if she taking her anger and jealously out on the club because she hates herself and if so, she should kill herself (to benefit her mental health).

Boys and girls, this is why Yuri has no friends.

Once that died down, Natsuki and Monika leave school and Yuri is all alone with the MC. Great. The crazy bitch has the boy she wants all by himself. The yandere with the knife collection is alone with the MC. Again, the crazy ass, nutty ass, yandere ass knife lover is alone with the boy she crushin’ on hardcore. What could go wrong?

Yuri confesses to the MC that she’s in love with him. Clearly. Then she reveals that she stole his pen and fucked herself with it. Okay. That’s creepy, but still ain’t that bad. Next, she was like “You love me too, right? You accept my love?”. I’m presented a choice to tell her if I do or not. I said yes: only because I am a fucking idiot who have a thing for smart, quiet, shy girls. And I also have a thing for anime girls with purple hair. Yuri gets excited. Super excited. So excited that she starts to breathe heavy, laughs, and whips out her knife to stab herself to death.

At was at that moment, I knew, I fucked up. Continued in Act 3.

By Yuki The Snowman Posted on May 13, 2018

Doki Doki Literature Club 0

Yuki’s Doki Doki Literature Club Adventures: Act 2 Part 1 (Freewrite)

Warning: Minor and major spoilers for Act 2. If you read this and get mad at me for spoiling things you ’re stupid. This may or may not had been written under the influence of alcohol.

First off, rest in peace Sayori you was a real one. I’ll save you or download a mod where you don’t die after I’ve completed my first run through.

Actually nah, not really. You can stay dead.

After a crazy day at work I decided to go to the liquor store near my house for another large can of Miller Beer (and some Jim Beam shot bottles), head to a park near my crib, rolled up a blunt, and smoke it while drinking (the beer) to get my mind right for Act 2. After that, I headed home and opened up my DDLC folder. Upon opening it I’m greeted with a file: “hxppy thxughts.png”. For a second, I thought I had downloaded while drunk/high (given I like to download weird fanart and hentai when I’m high/drunk), and place the image in the DDLC folder out of pure laziness. Then I remember that as you process in the game you unlock secret shit.

Ah well.

I booted up a new game. The MC made a wisecrack about some genki girl running down the street with bread in her mouth (replacing Sayori). I kinda laughed since this game does make fun of tired anime and visual novel tropes. However, I did stop laughing once the girl’s sprite started glitching. I was more annoyed than shocked through.

The game continued per normal as Act 1; expect Hanako 2.0 is the Vice President. Monika and Moe Fang Tsundere Otaku Girl (forgot her name) reprised their roles. Actually, I lied. The game doesn’t truly continue as normal. Natsuki started doing that Za Warudo shit off Jojo while Yuri’s sprite and the background went into a Dutch Angle; making me think I was playing one of my early 2000s ero-games. Yuri said something like how it’s amazing a writer can take advantage of your lack of imagination and throw you out of a loop.

Thanks Yuri. I thought it was the weed and beer that made me thought I was seeing things and not the game fucking with my head.

Following that, Yuri said something like how the world is full of evil people and how we all worthless at the end. Cool. After the first round of Poem Writing in act 2, I managed to romance Yuri. I was informed earlier that Yuri is a yandere and that she does some crazy shit with knives. Not something like tying up a little girl to a cross and stabbing her to death crazy shit, but somewhere close.

For some reason (for my notes possibly) I took a screenshot of the game from my FRAPS – or so I thought. I pressed “S” on my keyboard thinking I mapped the screenshot hotkey there. My game froze up for a bit and a message popped up: “Screenshot saved to blah blah blah folder”.

“Hold up, does the game know I’m recording and taking screenshots now?” I started to freak out. Yea, the Sayori suicide thing was a bit fucked up. The glitches and jump scare got me a little bit. But the game knowing I’m taking screenshots? That’s too much man. Then I remember: This game was made with that Ren’py engine. The screenshot key is automatically mapped to S.

This game isn’t fucking with me I’m just drunk.

Anyways, I resumed gameplay as normal. Everyone starts to read their poems. Natsuki and Yuri start to form a beautiful friendship/rivalry/a future yuri hentai scene over their poems by cussing each other out and starting a fight. Natsuki hurls some insults towards Yuri; calling her an edgy bitch and a cutter. Yuri claps back, telling Natsuki that she needs to stop acting cute. Me personally, I’m just waiting for Monika to pull out her phone, start recording, and yelling “World Staaaaarrrrrr!”.

Shit if I was the MC, I would instigate the fight further and egg both girls on until one of them snaps and beat the other girl’s ass.

DDLC 2018-03-26 21-43-25-28 — How friendships start

And it looks like I could actually make them fight. The game made me choose between the Yuri and Natsuki. I went for Yuri of course. But the game was like “Nah”. Then I was like “Fuck you I’m picking best girl Yuri.” Despite my wish to do so, the camera kept zooming in towards the Natsuki choice. I tried a few more times until Monika popped up and was like “Nigga you gonna pick Natsuki.”

DDLC 2018-03-26 22-02-29-99.png — “Sup.”

Monika steps in between the player and the girls and things chilled out. And by chill out, I guess Yuri made a crack about Natsuki’s dad abusing her – causing Natsuki to burst out in tears and leaving the school. Yuri, you should be proud of yourself for making fun of Natsuki’s suffering. I’m kinda glad you did kill yourself.

Yea, Hanako 2.0 winds up stabbing herself to death at the end of Act 2. I’ll come back to that later though. I wanna talk about on how the fuck Yuri found Dagger of Time from The Prince of Persia. Because I think she’s cutting herself with it.

After the fight scene, Yuri decides to make tea for her and the MC. Lovely. Tea is great. I love tea. I’m always down for some tea. Yuri runs off for some water or some shit. I wasn’t paying attention. The MC notices Yuri hasn’t come back and decides to go after her out of concern.
Yea, I don’t blame dude. Yuri’s both a cutter and a yandere. I’ve seen enough shit tier anime featuring yanderes to know that you shouldn’t trust them with food products. Yuri could have been cutting her wrists to put blood in the tea. But yea, dude catches her cutting herself with her knife. As dude tries to talk to her, the screen gets distorted and time’s reversed. Rather than being spooked, I started laughin’ again.

“Yuri has the Dagger of Time and she cuts herself with it!” I said to myself. Not really, it was just Monika fucking around. She explains how when she gets overly excited she starts cutting herself – and how she may do it for sexual reasons.

Yuri’s fucking weird. This game is fucking weird. Monika is the fucking villain and the game doesn’t hide it well. More in part 2.

DDLC 2018-03-27 11-09-45-09 — “They pen ain’t mightia than my pistol.” – Viper The Rapper

By Yuki The Snowman Posted on April 7, 2018

Doki Doki Literature Club 0

Is Monika From Doki Doki Literature Club Machiavellian? (VIDEO)

Doki Doki Political Club!

But real shit is Monika Machiavellian? She did use power and fear to control the game. She also tricked Sayori and Yuri to kill themselves just so she can get closer to the main character. In addition, she used fear to get her way by fucking with the player’s head AND deleting Sayori before Sayori became self-aware. What ya think?

By Yuki The Snowman Posted on March 28, 2018