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Anime Central – Day 0

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Ahh Anime Central.  Chicago’s ultimate otaku convention for partying and debauchery.  It’s a great convention to find hard drugs like coke and acid. There’s alcoholic beverages flowing  about.  Take a few shots for liquor courage to dick down  that Cecilia cosplayer!  Hey, Gotta celebrate Fire Emblem Gaiden’s  3DS remake somehow. There are also Persona orgies hosted by a kinky Shadow Rise cosplayer hunting down guys to run a train on her.   ACEN has the great shit for ya if you want it.

Oh yea, they have cosplaying nerds who ain’t fuckin each other in orgies and industry panels. That shit is boring. As an (somewhat) honest person, I’m gonna tell you what really goes down outside the panels and normal convention shit.  Autograph and photo sessions? Pfft. I rather waste time on my grind, writing passion, and networks. Why? So the anime and video game industry can notice my hardwork. I want to become lifelong friends with the niggas you stand in line for hours just to talk to them for twenty seconds out of your life.

Look, fuck all that lame boring shit that the average con attendees will tell.  I’m here to too you the  the real grimy shit.  You can trust me on keeping it real. I’m a real nigga.

Let’s start.

My friend “Adrian” (name changed because I’m the star and he’s not) and myself arrived in Chicago at 2:00pm Thursday afternoon after a long 10 hour trip from St. Louis via Amtrak.  You see, Amtrak was running a special deal. Riders will have to suffer through delays and constant route changes with no explanations!

Something about a fatal train derailment was thrown in, but we didn’t get that option.     Oh well.  Public transit is better than Amtrak. You don’t get that fine Chicago-style  piss smell on the Amtrak unlike Chicago’s CTA public transit.   CTA ride was nice, sans some homeless diabetic begging money for heroine.  Or was it insulin?  I dunno I don’t do (hard) drugs, and I’m not hip on the new and upcoming drug trends.

Following that  45 minute ride, we arrived at Rosemont, Il! Home of Anime Central.  Yes!  Finally I can make my grand announcement to my haters that the guy they secretly want to fuck but can’t has arrive!  The guy who they want to fight, but are too pussy to step up because they can’t carry their keyboards around.

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Me calling out the ACEN group’s internet tough guys who wanted to jump and fight me.  Never happened.

It’s me: Benjamin Snow.  I am the greatest otaku to have ever lived (one day I’ll snatch the Otaking title away from Toshio Okada) . I am the promised child of otaku culture niche, whom the prophets once warned the basement dwelling beta white cuck virgins weeaboos.   I am the main character of my haters’ lives.  I am the anti-hero protagonist of this tale.

I’m honored that you, the reader and haters, are focused on me. All eyes on me.

Adrian (I almost forgot about him) and I checked into our hotel, the Hilton, which is right across from the Hyatt, the main Anime Central hotel.  Hilton’s a nice hotel chain for lodging space.  Not a nice company to work for however unless you’re a masochist who hates their life.  Oh wait I forgot you ain’t supposed to talk shit about shitty companies you used to work for.  Actually, I take that back.  Hilton’s 3rd party contractors can be hit or miss.  Not the company itself.

Fuck you, Lodging Hospitality Management.

Grudges and come up revenge aside, my boy and I got a top floor room. We’re top tier men so we gotta be at the top.  After showering (not with Adrian, that’s pretty gay), I decided to head to the Hyatt to scan the place for anyone I know.  Encounter another homeboy, “Joe”.  Joe’s a cool guy who I really wish I could hang out with more often despite we live in the same city.  Big black guy  fighting game fan such as myself. After some small chat we decided to roll out to Rosemont Liquor, a super nice liquor store in Rosemont that you already know is gonna love the money they racked in from us alcoholic weeaboos.

Went in and brought a bottle of pineapple New Amsterdam, a pack of 312 Goose Island Wheat, and big boy beer: My first 12% beer in my life.  Trust me, drinking 12% beer is like smoking some fire ass kush after smoking that weak ass reggie for years on end.  Forgot the name of the beer but they’re not sponsoring me nor this blog, so it doesn’t matter.

Following, Joe and I drove back to my hotel.  During the drive, we spoke about fighting games, with Casual Player Neglect Fighter V being the main topic (Street Fighter 5) and how garbage it lowkey is. I brought up how for some reason despite not playing in months, I was able to beat my friendes who play nearly everyday with Karin.

 

Oh Capcom.  I hope one day, you guys figured out why nobody enjoy this game.

Joe dropped me off at my hotel, as he had prior plans with a friend.  Cool with me, given I had plans to kick it with another friend, “Vance”, and his Touhou cosplay crew at Hofbrauhaus.  I “met” Vance back at my first ACEN in 2013 as he was cosplaying as Momiji (from Mountain of Faith or whatever idunno I don’t play Touhou like that).  His outfit and the craftsmanship of it was amazing, and (at the time) Momiji cosplays were rather uncommon, so your boy had to take his pic.  I would not realized I met him at ACEN until later.

I officially met and hung out with Vance at Anime Crossroads 2013, at his Touhou Panel he was hosting.  We spoke about the series, our love for alcohol, and the convention scene in general.  We naturally clicked and overtime, he became a good con friend.  On some real shit, I wouldn’t mind being friends outside of cons with the dude…if I didn’t live in St. Louis but there’s always non-con traveling plans. Enough of my longing for networking with folks, to Hofbrauhaus

Hofbrauhaus’s food is amazing.  I could tell you the fantastic variety selection of dishes and drinks they have , but my black ass is too lazy to look up their menu online.  Settle with a picture of one of their dishes I that  cannot for the life of me pronounce.  I’m an American.  Not German.  We speak American in America.

After showcasing my quietness to people I don’t know outside my established friends in the group (I’m lowkey shy around strangers) and appropriating German culture (because I’m slightly racist), I  walked back to my hotel and holy fuck! It’s fucking cold and windy as fuck outside! You see, my dumbass thought it would had been a great idea to wear a light T-shirt and shorts earlier in the day, despite knowing the fact the tempts were dropping..

I’m pretty sure some folks saw me walking around shivering in shorts and a t-shirt and were like “This stupid ass nergo.”  Okay, I hope not.  Rosemont is mostly white people, and they don’t have the right to say Nergo. Kinda like how I don’t have the right to make racist jokes about the Germans in a German restaurant (inside my head of course). Das boot! Big titty thick Germans girls wearing those Dirndi dancing with giant beer mugs!  I swear I’m not racist towards Germans!

…fuck I’m racist.

I arrived back to my hotel to change into some warm clothes. Perhaps the harsh winds were karma for my inner-racism, but oh well. To help prove to myself I’m not a complete racist, I took up an offer to kick it with my white friend, “Beared Chibi-Usa” at ACEN’s infamous smoker’s circle.  Great source for debauchery.  And drugs!

chibi_usa

Bearded Chibi-Usa, as his name implies, is a guy who has a beard and cosplays as Chibi-Usa from the Bishoujo Senshi Sailor Moon series.  Maybe he’s actually cosplaying an alternate timeline of Chibi-Usa, who is actually a female-to-male transgender, and they have a beard. Who fuckin’ knows.  All I know is that this man is cool ass businessman and has his own online advertisement company. Make that new money young nigga.
During our chill and smoking (tobacco) session, we overheard a rather interesting conversation between two guys talking about a stillborn dead ass baby.  So, this loud ass guy was broadcasting how he may or not had been cucked by his (ex?) girlfriend at the time, and how his girlfriend felt so bad about it that she let the guy have pity sex with him.  Like, raw dog busting all types of nuts inside the girl’s pussy pity sex with a creampie ending.

As we all know, sex makes babies. Sometimes, stillborn babies. Hey, that’s life.  Some win.  Some lose.

pirate_erika

Despite people giving this guy confused looks and laughing at him, he kept going with the damn story.  Bearded Chibi-Usa and I exchanged “what the fuck” looks and walked away, trying to contain our laughs to no anvil.  We needed to drink after that, man. That was too much for us and this was day zero.  A fuckin’ Thursday night.

People; keep your personal business about being a cuck with a stillborn baby to yourselves.  I will laugh at you.

To keep your mind off how much of a fucked up piece of shit person I am for laughing at that poor guy, let’s go back to a certain point of this story.  Remember how I told ya Beared Chibi-Usa is a businessman? Well, some non-nerd businessman got on my boy case for being him; a nerd.  I don’t remember much of the details due to the alcohol and drugs, but I recall him shutting their ass down, talking about how he’s a businessman himself and that his company has clients from the companies the non-nerds work for.

Needless to say, he shut their ass down.  Ya non-nerds should really let go of the stereotype of the broke basement nerd still in their parents’ basement. But hey, they’re old fucks.  They have about what? 20-30 years of life left, and us young folks are gonna take their jobs overtime. No big deal.

We settle back to my room and we spoke upon various topics, such as grime rap, weight lost, and business.  Grime rap.  My god, no wonder it has that name.  Angry.  Aggressive.  Blunt.  Take what you know about (real) hip-hop culture,  give it steroids and make it British.  No, not fucking high class sip tea and eat crumpets British.  I’m talking the low income, brutal lifestyle of the the British.  Rap battles taking place inside decaying buildings and under bridges. Harden street rappers going berserk with their personal attacks against rivals and enemies.   You got your feelings hurt?  Fuck you,  you’re a grime rapper. Suck it up.

 

No wonder my boy got me hip to this genre.  I can see myself bumping this type of music and applying the story behind the music in my writings. I get inspired easily ya know.  Speaking of, his talk about business, and how his networks pretty much inspired me to work on my grind, hustle, and brand.  Here’s a young dude around my age with his own company, out here making moves and great money. I’m sitting here listening about his work.  I’m like “man, if he can do it, so can I.” Granted, it takes hard work, dealing with self-doubts, and overcoming both haters and personal failures to reach what you want in life. This shit doesn’t come overnight.

 

I’m dragging this story with nonsense filler and I pretty sure you guys want me to talk more about partying and less about my sappy self being inspired.  A couple of more folks came over to pregame (who I won’t mention because my uncreative ass can’t come up with fake names).  I think we played the godawful broken Sailor Moon Super S fighting game on my laptop, as well as a real fighting game like Super Street Fighter 2.  I got bodied in both because alcohol. One of my friends noticed my Sailor Saturn sticker on my laptop and we had a nice chat about why we like and relate to her (socially awkward but love having few but very close friends).   Come to think about it, I honestly forgot what happened from between me light partying and when I woke up the next morning.

Fuck it, onto Day 1.  A day in which gave me more inspiration from dudes doing better than myself, an convention and hotel staff hating on my alcohol collection, and me having to control my temper to prevent killing somebody who I thought was a friend.

 

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Sailor Saturn (Cocktail)

Viniq-Martell combo gonna have ya thinkin’ ya can destroy galaxies like Saturn.  Drink created at Anime Central 2017.

 

sailor_saturn

2 oz Viniq Liqueur
1oz Blue Raspberry Vodka
1oz Strawberry Vodka
2oz Blueberry Liqueur
Splash of Martell Congac
Splash of lime juice

Combine all ingredients in a shaker and strain over Old Fashioned glass. Serve cold. Like Saturn.

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Alternate version (not pictured)
1oz Strawberry Vodka
2oz Viniq
1oz blue raspberry vodka
1oz Martell Congac (or any other congac)
2 oz Blueberry liqueur
6 oz Sprite

Combine all ingredients sans Sprite in Collins glass. Top with Sprite
Please enjoy responsibility. Must be 21+ to consume.

 

Sailor_Saturn.png

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Rika to Bernkastel (Freewrite)

NOTE: This freewrite is based off memories of my experience with the  When They Cry series (Higurashi and Umineko)  I am too lazy to check if what I said are correct .  I may have some information wrong.

I’ve always enjoy characters that started out as heroes, but grew into villains.  It’s interesting to see what  events have such an impact on them that they decided to say “fuck it”,  evolving into a villain.  Some become villains due to an incident.  Others as a result of losing their hope and giving up on their goals.

I feel like Rika Furude from Higurashi no Naku Koro Ni (When The Cicadas Cry)  is such a heroine-turn-villain by the factors previously mentioned.  Tragic factors that caused the young child to become the sadistic witch, Bernkastel.

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Oh innocent Rika. So full of hope and optimism despite a fucked up life.

Rika had a pretty fucked up life despite being so young.  She’s theorized to be the queen carrier of the Hinamizawa Syndrone (a virus that cause victims to go into a psychiatric rage, increase anxiety, and commit violent homicidal and suicidal acts), her parents are dead, she can’t escape a timeloop that ends with her death,  is an alcoholic at the age of 9, and she also tried to stab Santa Clause to death.

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Seriously she really did try to murder Santa Claus. 

Initially, Rika started out as an optimistic and happy child, She  believed she could prevent the endless June 1983 tragic events.  She wouldn’t give up, no matter how bleak each situation felt.  Even when Hanyuu (her ancestor ghost or  whatever the fuck she is) flat out told her in the Massacre Arc that she and her friends will die, she just simply brush her aside, stating that she will defeat fate.

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Rika in her alcoholic rage.

Of course, Rika failed and Hanyuu was once again right.  Her friends got gun down by Miyo (the series’s true villain, who also had a fucked up childhood) and Rika got gutted by the crazed nurse-turned-terrorist.  Rika was proven wrong once again.  Don’t have hope children or you’ll end up like Rika.

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Keep thinkin’ that kiddo.

After a few oh let’s say hundred years’ worth of  losing and watching her  friends and love ones die , Rika’s mind and views changed. Once a girl full of hope was slowly becoming hopeless. Overtime, she stop caring about fighting against fate and saving her friends.   She became numb and cold.  Emotionless even.

She became Bernkastel, the witch of Miracles; A collection of hopeless Rikas from different worlds and timelines fused into one sadistic being.

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‘Lord, I don’t cry no more
Don’t look to the sky no more
Have mercy on me
Have mercy on my soul
Somewhere my heart turned cold’

“Many Men” by 50 Cent (American rapper)

Bernkastel is one of the main villains of Umineko no Naku Koro ni (When The Seagulls Cry), the spiritual successor to Higurashi (which I’m not gonna go into in-depth details with both series about their relation.  It’s fucking crazy). Simply put, Bernkastel is a piece of shit. She loves fucking with people, playing mind games with them.  She use people for her personal gain.  She’ll act like she’s your friend and ally, only to fuck you over at the end.   Ange Ushiromiya (a girl with her own tragic past and pain) had to learn that shit the hard way.

Boy did she learn the hard way.

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Best Umineko girl

Simply put, Bern doesn’t give a fuck about you.  Only herself.  Maybe her lover Lambdadelta and her teacher Featherine. But that’s it.  Bernkastel is the type of person who has clearly been through some shit. Horrible shit that changed her.  The way she deals with that shit is by passing her own pain upon others to make her feel better about herself.  She wants others to experience the pain she went through from her past.  A past she really hates.

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To conclude this unorganized freewrite, horrible events creates horrible people who started out nice and heroic. Rika was an innocent carefree girl, and yet due to being a victim one too many time, became a horrible corrupted being who had her point of view destroyed.

higurashinonakukoronirei_04-00

 

 

ART SOURCES:

Shut the Fuck Up Hanyu:
http://kyousgayart.tumblr.com/post/89109835477/serious-higurashi-fanart

 

Rika and Bernkastel

https://www.pixiv.net/member_illust.php?mode=medium&illust_id=28677576

 

Feature image:
https://www.pixiv.net/member_illust.php?mode=medium&illust_id=207464

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So You Wanna Throw a Convention Hotel Room Party

Gotta love room parties.  Where else can you find a normally socially awkward  Uthena cosplayer  drunk off shots of Hennessy flirting with other women, a Future Trunks cosplayer high off coke that he snorted off a Hex Maniac cosplayer’s ass,  and two stoned Persona fans talk about who’s best girl(s) in Persona 5? (the answer: Tae and Ohya)

Yea, you could visit multiple room parties. That’s cool and all.  But, what is cooler is hosting your own room party.  You can become the source of otaku debauchery!  I’ll teach you how!

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Cosplaying nerds aren’t innocent.  Also this blog does NOT promote illegal drug usage. 

The Hotel

To host a room party, you obviously need a hotel room. Make you have booked a room. Location is key.  You want to host your party at the primary convention hotel.  Hosting at the secondary hotel isn’t bad either,  just as long as it’s not too far from the main hotel(s). Ain’t nobody gonna drive 20 minutes to your lame ass hotel party.  A suite, a large single king-size room, or two rooms that are linked are best choices for room partying (depending on how the size of the party you’re planning).

If the convention hotel has a dedicated floor/wing/etc. for parties, request a room on that floor.  Some hotels will move your room to the party floor for free, while others require an additional fee (around an extra $100 a night).

Anime Nebraskon (Omaha), Anime Midwest (Chicago),  Anime Weekend Atlanta (Atlanta), DragonCon (Altanta) , and Archon (St. Louis) are conventions that I’ve personally attended in which they have a select floor or wing for partying.

Hospitality

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If you were Rika from Higurashi you’d be an alcoholic too.

The job of a host is showing as much hospitality to your guests as possible.  Greet everyone with a smile.  Show them respect. Make them feel comfortable and welcomed.  This means cleaning the room hours before the party and throughout it, having liquor, juices, soda, food, and water available (which I will cover later). Talk to as many of your guests as possible. Be friendly.  Trust me, doing these things will net you repeat visitors for future parties.

Cleaning Supplies

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Spills and party fouls happen.  It’s  unavoidable, but that doesn’t mean you can’t clean up (plus, you don’t want cleaning fees on your bill). Cleaning supplies will help you in the long run, and plus, cleaning goes hand-in-hand with hospitality.

Here what you’ll need:

Trashbags: Hotel trashbags are small, weak, and will overflow quick.  You want something that’s heavy duty, like Hefty trashbags.  3-7  heavy duty trashbags should be more than enough for your party.  Tie a trashbag on the door handle for easy access for trash and waifus alike.

Paper Towels: Paper towels are godsend for messes.  Get something strong and absorbent like Brawny or Bounty.

Tip: Don’t use the hotel towels.  You’ll need them to dry yourself off , after you’ve washed off the shame of sleeping with that Black Lady (Sailor Moon) cosplayer after the party ended. You know,   the one who was way into character calling you “daddy” while you were raw dogging her from behind.

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Sleep with crazy. Don’t date crazy.

Dish Soap: For difficult stains. Plus the best dish soap smells good.

Disinfection Wipes: Great way to kill germs and reduce con pluage from unwashed, unhealthy virgin nerds.

Febreze:  Because people don’t fucking shower at conventions.

Having these simple cleaning products will help you in the long run. You don’t need everything on the list, but it’s useful to have at least trash bags, dish soap, febreze,  and paper towels on stand by.

Food and  Drinks:

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What’s a party without food or drinks? A rather boring one,  run by a host who’s most likely a freeloader, expecting others to bring things but not providing anything in exchange.  Nobody likes those type of people.  You gotta  have your own set of food and drinks at your party.

Here what you’ll need:

Alcohol (LEGAL DISCLAIMER: DO NOT SERVE ANYONE UNDER 21)

3 Bottles of plain Vodka
2 Bottles of  plain White Rum
2 Bottles of Dark Rum
1 bottle of tequila
1 bottle of gin
1 bottle of Triple Sec
1 bottle of Schnapps
1-3 bottles of Liquer (Peach, Sour Apple, Midori, coffee, etc.)
1 bottle of Rumchata
1 bottle/box or red wine
1 bottle/box or white wine
Case of beer (24-36 pack work best)
1-6 bottles of fruit flavored vodka/rum  (pineapple, mango, raspberry, etc.)
 

Juices:
Orange Juice
Pineapple Juice
Apple juice
Fruit Juice/Punch
Lemon/Lime juice
Cranberry Juice
Sweet and Sour Mix
Tonic

Sodas:
Coke
Lemon-Lime
Dr. Pepper
Ginger Ale
Root beer
Club soda

24-36 case of bottled water

On the food end, pizza and chicken wings work well.  You can order 1-3 pounds of wings and 5 boxes of cheap pizza for an entire party. Convince party goers to put in on the food.  Don’t let others mooch off your shit.

Promotion

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Nobody will come to your party if they’re unaware. You must promote it.  Create a Facebook event.  Speak to people at the convention.  Networking is key.  Now, if room partying is against hotel rules, keep it on the low.  Only tell a very select few people that you can trust.

Besides, you don’t want your party shut down because you let the wrong people in.

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Oh, this can happen too.  Don’t violate disturbing the peace laws.

Rules

psg_rules

As a host, you gotta have rules.  Yeah, parties can be chaotic, that’s a given.  But you need to lay down some rules and have order to ensure a safe and happy party for you and your guests.

 

My general rules:

  1. Respect the host and host’s room
  2. Don’t be a creep and make others uncomfortable
  3. Don’t fuck/sleep on my/our bed
  4. Don’t steal. You steal you’re getting your ass beat and booted.
  5. Keep noise at a reasonable level to prevent noise complaints.
  6. No smoking unless it’s a smoking floor, 420 friendly hotel, etc. Also match me. I’ll match you too.
  7. No one under 21 (if serving alcohol)


Just simple universal rules that should work.  You can add your own rules for your party depending on the nature.

 

Hope these tips help! Feel free to apply them to your own parties.  Be safe and have fun this con season!  If you have any suggestions and advice, please post them in the comments section below!

Further Reading:
https://matadornetwork.com/nights/how-to-throw-a-secret-party-in-a-hotel-room/

http://www.betches.com/how-to-throw-a-hotel-party

Art Sources:

Second best Hotaru making terrible life choices:
http://www.pixiv.net/member_illust.php?mode=medium&illust_id=55182233

Featured image source:
https://www.pixiv.net/member_illust.php?mode=medium&illust_id=929247

Sakuya cleaning:
https://www.pixiv.net/member_illust.php?mode=medium&illust_id=40230929

Black Lady fanart (WARNING: NSFW wesbsite):
http://www.hentai-foundry.com/pictures/user/utilizator/165232

Gundam getting arrested:
https://www.pixiv.net/member_illust.php?mode=medium&illust_id=9441297

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Resurrection of Freeza. Again. Yay… (Slight Freewrite)

This past week, news from  2channel (Japanese image board) surfaced citing the return Freeza to Dragon Ball Super (DBS) for the Universe Survival Arc.  I didn’t care at first; the major Dragon Ball YouTubers (Geekdom 101, Qaadman’s Land, Dragon Ball Nation, etc.) I follow and trust didn’t believe it was legit news.  The lack of a secondary and more trustworthy source made it less believable. It’s 2channel.  Any ol’ (Japanese-reading) nerd can post some fake ass shit on there and pass it off as “legit” news.

However, long-time Dragon Ball news translator Herms98 posted his translations of the upcoming Japanese TV Guide  Dragon Ball Super episode synopsis; confirming the return of ruthless tyrant. Freeza will replace Majin Buu in the Tournament of Power (whom once again, has gone to sleep right before a major tournament).

C_RMvR2VwAAkTyH

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Japanese TV Guide “spoilers” for Dragon Ball Super Ep. 90-93

I’m honestly not happy with Freeza returning.  I mean yeah, having a different warrior outside of Goku’s clique representing Universe 7 is refreshing. We didn’t need ten warriors from Earth as a team that suppose to represent a vast universe.

Yet, Freeza replacing Buu just seems like lazy writing on Toei’s end. The Majin Buu falling asleep trick is old. We’ve seen Freeza returned ten times throughout the series.  We get it; Toei has a hard on for Freeza.  Some of us fans do not.

Toei, please end the Freeza dicking riding session.

While I’m not happy Freeza is coming back, I do look forward to his interactions with the Z Warriors.  Especially with the ones he has a storied history with (Piccolo, Krillin, Goku, and of course Vegeta: prince of no one).  Piccolo’s home planet was invaded by this man. Krillin pretty much has PTSD from Freeza torturing and killing him. Vegeta and Goku’s entire race was wiped out by this dude; with Vegeta being misled about Freeza’s killing his.

I doubt Freeza wants to work with past enemies, but if it means getting out of that damn cocoon surrounded by pretty stuffed animals and fairies as a bargain, then I guess he’ll have to work with folks he don’t like.

DxzwWyj

 

But seriously Toei stop the dick riding of Freeza.

 

SOURCES:
Herms98’s translation of Freeza’s return

Geekdom101 video on Freeza’s return:

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Online Con Season Drama – This Goofy Shit (Freewrite) (Rant)

With the spring/summer con season rolling, there’s something goofy I’ve noticed within the community recently: online con season drama. I know online con drama is a long running thing.  It’s nothing new but I feel like this season, it gotten out of hand. People are getting way too bold with their beefs and shit talking.

This morning, a Facebook friend did a live video on how there’s so much silly ass drama prior to the con.  One topic she touched upon was  that on how niggas love to talk that good shit on convention groups; talking about meeting up to fight con and cause conflict.

Yet, they’re super quiet and scared to do to their target. At most, they’ll just give the person they don’t like a dirty look, or come up to them with that fake friendly (as if they weren’t on any childish shit prior).  I just simply told her that I agreed, given I’ve noticed this trend for a while.

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 Uranus cosplayer confronting a Saturn cosplayer  who was talking shit about her on an anime convention group.

Like, folks plan all year to go to an event for 3-4 days to chill, network/do business, showcase their cosplay,  party, etc.  Nobody (sane) wants to meet up at a con just to fight and cause conflict over something pitiful.  People invested way too much money, energy, and time  into goin to a con, just to fight. Just to start drama. I don’t know how or why this trend got started but I just find it goofy.

I mean, I have a theory: ever since nerd culture and social media got popular and blew up, folks egos grew with it.  I’ve also noticed for about the last five of the seven years I’ve been in the cosplay and convention community, people love to talk that good shit online about meeting up.

It’s kinda sad because back when I was younger, if you were caught talking shit online or in person to start drama, you got your ass beat and/or blacklisted.  Simple as that.   Or folks will make fun of you, and tell you that they’re not your personal army if you were trying to rally against somebody for no reason.  Nowadays  people support this sorta thing in the nerd community.  Supporting physical fights and clowning on somebody over something minor or silly they said online.

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How I deal with folks who want to fight me over my trolling and blunt words at conventions.

That’s my little rant for today.  Just something I wanna get off my chest.  Ya need to chill out this con season.

 

Homura “Hi Hater Bye Hater” art source:

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Queen Rei

“Queen Rei” is the perfect title for Rei. Throughout episode 8 of the Doom Tree arc (The Festival is For Me?! Queen Rei Sings With Passion), she earns her queenly title through her musician passion and bossy attitude.  Using her title and pull, she uses her school’s festival  to produce and direct her own concert.  It’s all about her. Despite her seemly effortless drive, in reality, she struggled.  A struggle she hides with boastful bragging.

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In the beginning of the episode, we see the queen doing what she does best: being a boss.  She demands order and productivity; snapping on underclassmen for idling around.  She yells at another student worker for leaving audio gear lying around.  She is pissed by the incorrect stage lighting during her rehearsal.   Frustrated, Rei tells everyone to break.

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Her (possibly gay) fangirls don’t seem to mind the yelling and bossing around).  At least their senpai noticed them.

During her break, Rei boasts of her hard work to friends Usagi and Ami (whom were watching her rehearsal). She proudly admits to taking advantage of her status of head executive committee of the student council; using it to promote her concert and music.  Music that she produced herself.

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Queen Rei truly earned that title. She’s like Beyonce or Janet Jackson even.  Some may not agree with Rei’s attitude and directing style however.

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Real shit from a real music  legend.

 

Later, the queen and her circle regrouped at Hikawa Shrine, discussing on the festival and her concert.  Ami remarks at Rei’s hard work. She assumed that it took Rei many hours to produce  music.  Rei gloats again, telling the  nerd that her own natural talent made the work effortless.

Yet, Rei’s inner thoughts tell an opposite story.  She struggled.

Her frustration spoke as she slam her hands down the keyboard. She snatches early drafts of her music off the piano, tossing it in trash. Finally, Rei lays her head down, holding back tears. The young girl feels defeated. Defeated, and disappointed.

I should give up. It’s not worth it anymore.  Nobody will like this.’

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All creative types can relate to this.

I can imagine her thinking such these things.  Her early prideful talk was a cover for her insecurities and struggles.  Nevertheless, she managed to overcome the insecurities, producing music that she’s proud of.

The episode transitions to concert day.    Rei is warmly greeted with cheers from peers and friends alike. She thanks her fans and introduces herself in third person, referring herself as “Rei-Chan”. She gotta feed her ego like like another great artist, Kanye West.

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She knows, she so fucking gifted.

Rei starts performing.  Everything is all well. All well until resident alien fuckboy Ail does his usual Cardian summoning.   The Cardian of the week: Seiren.

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The Sailor Scouts do their usual  “attack the bad guy” routine, only to fail once again.   Rei transform into Mars, talk shit about how the monster ruined her concert, harmed her fans, and vows to end the threat.  Mars attack Seiren, setting her on fire, but the monster puts her out with her water magic.

All hope seems lost until Moonlight Knight appears; offering his weekly self-help guru bullshit motivation  advice (with the week’s topic being on a beautiful melody at the soundless part of the universe and requests Mars to sing that melody for him one day). Moonlight Knight launches at Seiren, whom dodges his attack, and knocks over Mars’s music, destroying it.

(Thanks Moonlight Knight! You ruined everything yet again.)

Mars is saddened and pissed.  Hours of her dedication, love, passion, overcoming self-doubts, and her achievement: destroyed.  This wasn’t just some random, untalented asshole or hater talking shit about her works; somebody ruined her hard work.

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It’s like if somebody snatched your art or notebook out of your hands Tearing pages out from it in front of your face.  All of your passion and dedication into your craft is in ruins.

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Mars’s anger brought forth a new power: Fire Soul Bird.  With the new power and her rage, Mars attacks Seiren with furious anger…which her firely passion only disabled the monster just  so Sailor Moon can get the kill.

 

Because Sailor Moon must always wins. Just like 2010 John Cena.

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After defeating Seiren,  Queen Rei (or Rei-Chan)  resumed her concert (which nobody seems to question why they let her continued it  after the monster attack).  She steals Moonlight Knight’s inspirational line about a star singing in a soundless universe (all great artists gotta steal at least a few things), and closes her concert out with  a cheesy sounding 90s  love song in which I could not give two fucks about.

It’s not Holy Flame Fire Soul Love.

Rei is truly a passionate queen.  From between her bossing folks around and pouring her soul into her music, Rei shines and she lets her shine be noticed.  As queen, we see that she has influences and is quite bossy on the stage.  With her passion, we see her pride, joy, and overcoming insecurities  with her music (even if she did hide the insecurties from her friends).

Rei is truly the queen.

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Queen Beryl or: How (Unrequited) Love Makes People Crazy (Freewrite)

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I wonder, how Queen Beryl could let her love for King Endymion consumed her so much, that she allowed herself to be control by Metalia, and murdered an entire kingdom. Did she felt entitled to his love or something?  I understand love can make you do many a crazy things, and boy did this woman did some crazy ass shit.

Beryl caused a young girl to commit suicide after murdering her family and friends. Not just muderer that girl’s love ones, but she also slaughtered an entire kingdom.  All because she couldn’t get some dick from the dude she was crushing on.

Maybe Endymion and Beryl had a small chat one day and my dude knew she was crazy as fuck, and was like “Nah.”

This woman was a low-level sage who overtime, became corrupted by power and love.  Unrequited love mind you. She legit thought she could let a king fall in love with her commoner ass.

Girl who the fuck you think you are?  Stay in your place.

But forreal, how did her seemly innocent crush evolved into pure jealously and hatred towards Princess Serenity?  Why was she driven to the point of mass murder over love?

“What you won’t do for love” doesn’t mean slaughter an entire population, Beryl.  I’m sure Bobby Caldwell wasn’t on that shit when he wrote that song.

 

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These are the things I think about on my off day, when I make no plans to kick it with the homeboys, and I have nothing better to do but to overthink about fictional Japanese cartoon and comic characters while listening to vaporwave.

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Nerd Gatekeeping, Quizzing, and Understanding.

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We nerds are goofy.  You’d think that from experiencing rejection and exclusion  by non-nerds, we would be welcoming of our fellow nerds nerds.  But nah, we’re not.  Some indulge in repeating the same exclusion and rejection cycle they faced in the past to other nerds.  Elitist nerds will play the gate keeping game; allowing certain “real” nerds in their circle.

Others will quiz people who they deem fake; asking questions and checking if a person is knowledgeable to their personal level.  This essay will explore gate keeping, quizzing, and understanding the causality of such acts.

Gatekeeping is common, yet old practice, existing before the social media and nerd culture boom.  Gatekeeping is the act of not allowing certain people into the community; fearing that they’re fake, attention seeking fans (nerds blessed with good looks are often accused of being fake), or casual fans who don’t appreciate the source material.

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Example: Some Shin Megami Tensei (SMT) fans believe you’re not a real fan of the SMT series if you started out on Persona, or haven’t branched out to other games of the franchise.  Some hardcore SMT fans have belittle, mock, and excluded the newcomers; judging them for not starting or being interested with the archaic (but fun) early games such as SMT 2 or Megami Tensei.

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Elitists feel that to be a real fan, you must have outlandish amount of experience and knowledge before joining their ranks.  It’s really just their insecurities speaking.  They’re afraid of the inclusive.

But hey! What’s a great way to cope with your insecurities?  Showcasing your superior, yet unimportant knowledge by quizzing folks!  Elitists quiz others on topics that only the truly hardcore (virgin) nerd knows.  They’ll ask things like “Who was Akira Toriyama’s first editor”, or “What comic issue did Raven (Teen Titans) debut”?  It’s a test to prove you’re worthy to call yourself a real fan.   Honestly, it’s stupid and it makes you come off as an asshole.

You know some useless nerd trivial.  Congratulations.  Nobody is trying to play your quiz game. Nigga you ain’t Alex Trebek.

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It’s articles like these that make me an borderline alcoholic.

 

When compared to their male counterparts, female nerds are more likely to be subjected to quizzing.  These beta ass males can’t believe that women have nerdy hobbies and interests, so they gotta drill them to see if they’re not “fake”.

Oh, you’re a pretty girl at a comic book shop who takes care of her personal hygiene, rock a My Hero Academia snapback, and wear a Captain America shirt because you’re a legit fan of the comics before the movies because your dad passed down his Captain America comics to you?  If you’re a real Captain America fan, then name the main staff who worked on the June ’97 issue of Captain America!

Can’t answer?  You must be a fake nerd girl.  Girls don’t read comics!

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I mean, I get that these dudes are (probably) still mad about being bullied and rejected for being nerds by girls back in their high and middle school days, but let that shit go.  Don’t become the bully  fucking with a chick just because she’s a nerd and you assume she’s not a real fan. Go get help or something bruh.

While I do not agree with the gatekeeping, nerd checks, and quizzing, I can somewhat understand why they do such actions.   Nerds were/are ridiculed, bullied, and mock for their hobbies for decades.  Prior to the recent nerd boom, nerds weren’t accepted by the mainstream.  Having nerdy interests was considered weird; nobody wanted to fuck with you.  People were on  that “Oh I’m a nerd!” game,  only to play the real nerds and hurt them for being nerdy.

When you’ve been bullied and teased for your hobbies, you tend to be defensive.   It’s a shame that people are like this, but it happens.

Maybe if these elitists weren’t so hurt. Not saying what they’re doing is right though.

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We nerds are goofy.  You’d think we would be more welcoming of other nerds to our circle.  Sadly, with elitism, quizzing, and “nerd checking”, this isn’t the case in our community.  Quizzing and nerd checking may leave out some and expose “fake” nerds, but is it worth making newcomers feel excluded?

I can understand why the elitist do this due to ill experiences, however, you got to let go of the past.  Past experiences shouldn’t’ determine that everyone on that fake shit based off assumptions.

I would say it’s possible to end this but that would require humanity to end as well.

IMAGE SOURCES:
http://thomwade.tumblr.com

http://www.not-literally.com/2013/12/11/the-problem-with-true-fans/

https://www.wattpad.com/story/61718884-make-the-school-nerd-tears-fall

https://www.facebook.com/playarealsmtgame/

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Catcallin’. Why? (Barely edited freewrite)

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As I’m about to sit down at the busstop bench after grocery shopping, a woman asked me a question.  Normally, I’m annoyed by strangers asking me shit while I am minding my own business, but my gut was like “listen to this person”.  She asked me why do men feel the need to catcall and holla at women for sexual favors.  I was thrown off by this question, given I don’t catcall women or try to talk to them for sex (plus you don’t do that in general towards women on some respect shit).  I replied with “people, mainly men, are stupid and ain’t go respect for women.”

She followed up with “I’m from Arkansas and I never had men catcall me and try to offer me for sex down there, but here in St. Louis, I had different dudes asking me for that shit. I don’t sell my body!  I make an honest living. I don’t like this.”  I explain to her that St. Louis folks (for the most part), are ignorant and tend to be on some stupid ass shit for no reason (catcalling is an universal thing yes but I can assume the Southern parts of America are on that respect thing, compared to St. Louis and the Midwest from what Southerners have told me coming up here)

I can’t say I understand her pain because I’m not a woman, and will never experience the bullshit women go through, but at the same time, it upset me that this woman had to deal with this.

I don’t get it.  Why do dudes feel entitled to do goofy ass shit like cat calling towards women? I mean yea, I had holla at a woman with a rather vulgar line (a line I can’t really repeat here) when I was 16 and trying to fit in with the boys,  but  now that I’m a grown ass man, I don’t see the joy of making a woman uncomfortable with tasteless words, yelling with pretty much harassment. At what point when dudes felt entitled to say such fucked up things to women?

  (Regular nerd related posts will return later tonight)

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Taking the First Step (Freewrite)

Taking the first step is scary.  You get nervous, have doubts,  lose confidence, and fears hold you back.  Once you knock those negative feelings aside, you must take a plunge.  You must take that first step.   Nothing will ever happen to you if you don’t move forward. You won’t get anywhere in life that way.

‘You never gone make it if you never rolled a dice
Take the first step, that was Doctor King’s advice’

-Dom Kennedy – Locals Only (2011 hip-hop single)

Things will get easier as you take that step and move forward.  The other day, I took the first steps to forward and invest into my dreams.  I decided to run two ads on my  Facebook page for two recent projects I’m proud of.   The first is my analysis on the Sailor Moon S narrative themes, and my analysis on Bakemonogatari’s Hitagi’s mental health.  Yea, instant success and engagement won’t happen overnight, it’s a long process. A process I must stick with long term if I want long term success.

It’s a risky thing to do; investing money into a Facebook ad in hopes that people will read my writings and spread it around.  But what’s life without taking risks?  What’s life without taking that first step?  If you do not take that risk, that gamble, you’ll never move forward in life.  You’ll never be successful.

I’m gonna move forward.

 

 

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It’s alright.  Take a chance.  You can do anything.

 

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Work/Grind While They Sleep (Freewrite)

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Recently, I came across my new phase; “Work While They Sleep, Grind While They Party”.   To break it down to even simpler terms,  take advantage of your rivals and competition’s  partying and sleeping ways.  Work your ass off while these sleep and party.  Get a head start of the game before the others.

A couple of my posts (such as my Sailor Moon Infinity analysis and my recent analysis of Hitagi Sengahara’s mental health analysis), were done at night, for about 2-5 hours a night.  Other were done at night and the next morning, with me taking a 6-7 hour sleep form between those time, and before I head to work.

I like this phase.  It’s a movation tool to work harder to reach my goals.  Moviation for me to work on my passion so I donot have to work for anyone else in my life.

Yea it sucks to sacrifice nights of partying, and hours of sleep, but I rather spend the nights working on my blog, posts, and learning about the anime industry  I want to make a name out myself.  A legacy even.  .

Don’t get me wrong: partying with yout friends every once-in-a-awhile is cool.  You shouldn’t isolate yourself from the crew.  Sometimes, you need a night to relax and enjoy yourself.  Just don’t makie it an hobby.

Work while they grind.  Learn while they sleep.  It’ll be worth it for your futre.

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Hitagi Senjougahara: Trauma, Trust Issues, and Defense Mechanisms (Truth in Fiction)

TRIGGER WARNING: Rape, molestation, and child abuse mentioned.  If you’re bothered by these things, please please please, for the sake of your mental health, do not read on.  Thank you.

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A traumatic incident can screw up one’s mind.  It creates defense mechanisms, anxiety, and trust issues.  Hitagi Senjougahara, main heroine of the anime and light novel series “Monogatari”,  experienced such things.  To repay a debt owed to a cult, Hitagai’s mother  set her up to be molested and rape by a high ranking cultist. Hitagi resisted, hitting the cultist with a spiked shoe.  Afterwards, her dad filed for divorce, and Hitagi haven’t  spoke to her mom since.

Overtime, Hitagi grew distance, hostile, and untrusting of others.

‘And now you’re kinda cold to the people you met
Cause of something that was done to you by some creep.’
Whodini: Friends (1984 hip-hop single).

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Throughout the “Hitagi Crab” arc ,  we learn of the condition and causality of Hitagi’s literal weightlessness, as well as her hostile nature.  After Araragi (series’s main hero) saves her from an otherwise fatal fall, he discovers that she’s weightless. In fear that he might run his mouth about her state, Hitagi attacks him. She shoves a mini stapler inside his mouth, stapling his check.

After removing the lodged staple from his check, Araragi reveals his healing factor.  Hitagi was shock that there was somebody like her (in terms of weirdness).  Araragi offers to help her regain her weight, taken by a god crab spirit.

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As Araragi and Hitagi bike to Oshino’s (friend of and occult advisor to Araragi) residence, the two engaged in an interesting conversation.  Hitagi refers herself as a tsundere (otaku slang for a character who’s hostile and cold initially, but grows softer and warm towards close ones overtime).  This fits her well. Hitagi is cold, distanced, and hostile due to her mental trauma and physical condition. With Araragi’s reveling  his powers, understanding her situation, and knowing someone who could help her, Hitagi gradually warms up.

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Right!

There are two points I want to explore here:

Prior to meeting Oshino, Araragi asks Hitagi if he could hold on to her school supplies (which double as her weaponry). She responds “You set me up, right?”, pauses, and surrender her goods.  At the second point, upom meeting Oshino, Hitagi asks if he could save her.  Oshino responds with that only she could save herself. Hitagi snaps on him, stating that  five people prior told her the same thing, only to try to scam her.  She then asks Oshino if he was a scammer himself, which he only laughs off her (somewhat baseless) fears.

This made me wonder: are her worries defense mechanisms?  If so, you can’t blame her. Victims of traumatic experiences tend to be more defensive and aggressive towards others.   Traumatic experiences can changed one’s point of view, as Oshino pointed out to Hitagi about hers.

‘If I trust a person so easily, I don’t know how many times I would’ve been tricked.”
-Hitagi Senjouhara

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Fasting forward to episode 2’s ritual scene, Oshino asks Hitagi a series of questions.  The first few are basic: school life, date of birth, and favorite author. All to each she answered unhesitating.  When asked about her most painful memory of her life however, Hitagi freezes up, taking a sharp breath.  Regaining herself, Hitagi painfully recalls the attempted sexual assault.   She brings up that  her mother was punished because she fought back against the cultist.

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Her parents divorced soon after.   Hitagi felt guilt for her resistance, blaming herself  for breaking the family apart (of course, it wasn’t her fault). She felt anger towards  her mom;  she did not save her. Oshino tells her that these were her feelings, feelings that she can’t transfer to others.

Feelings that she must carry the burden on her shoulders.

In their conversation, Oshino uses the word “omoi”, which can either mean “Feelings” or Weight” (depending on the kanji).  What I like about the word usage is the  symbolism of the meaning. The feelings caused by horrific, traumatic experiences are a heavy weight to carry.   You go through life blaming yourself when you should not, closing yourself off from others and being on edge; unsure if people will hurt you physically, or emotionally.

A weight that you can never get rid of;  just only overcome  it with proper help and support.

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At the end of the ritual, Hitagi  confronts  the crab god whom stripped her weight.  Hitagi freaks out.  Her breathing is heavy, eyes widen.  Her body is frozen in fear , muscles tensed.  Hitagi asks if anyone else can see the crab, which the others reply with that they cannot.

Hitagi shuts down right as the crab attacks.  Oshino rescues Hitagi and destroy the spirit.  He explains the crab is the result of her  mental state.  Finally, after thanking him, she breaks down and starts to cry uncontrollably.

Hitagi’s freezing, fears, tense body language, breathing heavily, avoidance of the crab, and crying made me think:  was she having a PTSD flashback of the attempted rape? Yeah I mean, the crab is a supernatural force for storytellin, but her response to not confront it, in addition to her being asked about her most painful life experience, can be debated in favor of this theory.

When triggered, victims of traumatic events experienced symptoms such as heavy breathing, feelings of tightness, emotional break downs, and avoidance of anything that reminds them of the incident to name a few examples.

After Hitagi regain her composure, Oshino tells her that despite how much she longs for her family to return, and her desires to remove the pain, those things will never happen.  She must learn how to overcome it and grow stronger.  At the end, she gained a new friend (and eventually boyfriend) in Araragi and  gain her “weight” back as well.

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Ohhh…tired of the strain and the pain’
‘There’s so much pain…’
-2pac: Pain  (1994 rap single)

Special thanks and shout out to my homeboy Mr. Y giving me advice and tips and checking if my info on mental health was correct.  Check out his blog here:

https://wordpress.com/read/feeds/61835112

Further reading:

http://www.mentalhealthamerica.net/conditions/post-traumatic-stress-disorder
https://psychcentral.com/lib/15-common-defense-mechanisms/
http://traumaabusetreatment.com/trust-issues-after-trauma
http://childhoodtraumarecovery.com/2013/06/20/childhood-trauma-defence-mechanisms-resulting-from-stress/
https://www.psychologytoday.com/blog/somatic-psychology/201107/effects-trauma-estrangement-family

Screenshots Source:
http://blog.seiha.org/index.php?s=bakemonogatari

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Raven’s Meditation: Truth in Fiction (Freeewrite)

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I’m gonna to reveal to you guys how slow I am.

Until recently, I never understood why Raven meditate to control her emotions (and powers). As we know in the show (and comics I assume), her powers are linked to her emotional state. If her emotions go haywire, her powers will get the best of her, pretty much fucking things up.

People with emotional problems such as anger management issues (something I’m sadly an expert in) can control their emotions by meditating; relaxing their mind and body. With the help of mediation, you can calm yourself down (as well as deep breathing, counting slowly to 10, and focusing your anger on something postive, etc).

In short, Raven’s meditation to control herself is an reflection on how there is truth in fiction.  She controls her emotions.  She doesn’t allow her emotions to control her.

But real shit I’m fucking slow lol

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Haters Are Goofy (Barely Edited Freewrite)

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Haters are goofy.

Being in the creative field (and my ever-growing internet popularity), gaining and encountering hate is a natural (but fun) thing.  It’s the order of life , something that will  only end when humanity ends.   As somebody who doesn’t get mad, jealous, or hateful towards successful people, I never got the joy of hating off somebody else’s success or passion.  I find inspiration in those who are doing better than I am.  It just means I need to keep pushing to reach their level.

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A grown ass woman  in her 30s with a 6-digit salary career  about to hate on a 12-year-old kid.  That’s fucking sad.

Recently, I’ve been gaining some hate from both internet niggas, and a member of my own blood family.  Although I’m not (completely) mad at these haters, I find their hate funny.  These fools that are hating on me are doing way better in their lives compared to my own life.  They have careers, wives/girlfriends, their own cars and houses while I’m struggling.

And yet, they take the time out of their own apparently “successful” and “happy” lives to talk down on me.  The family member hater has a newfound hobby of reminding me of my past failures and is belittling me about my current situation. Funny thing, this dude won’t offer me advice or support to get out of this situation (granted this dude had an arrest warrant out for him last year, and he screwed over his roommates  rent money the year before, so take that how you want to)

Guess it’s easier to put down others than to lift them up (a depressing issue in the Black community).

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Their hate got me wondering though: I must be doing something right with my passion and drive to better myself.  The haters don’t like that.  They rather see me be stuck forever, than me to make progress in life.  They fear the fact that one day, I’ll prove their bullshit wrong.

Fear and paranoid is a bitch ha ha ha.  But real shit, haters are goofy.

‘I’m just enjoying my mother fuckin’ life that’s all.  I advise you to do the same.’

Katt Williams

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When you finally stunt on that hater.